| A
male
,
anonymous
writes: Hello. I am with my girlfriend just over a month now but we never have much sex. i am 20 and she is 18 and we only had sex twice. i don't understand but my sex drive is not as big with this girl compared to other girls i had on one night stands. I prefer to have a cuddle with her than do anything else. I really like this girl better than any other. She is special. But can someone explain why i don 't feel like having sex with her everynight like any other couple?
View related questions:
one night stand, sex drive Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 April 2006): i have been with my partner 2 years at first the sex was great but now we hardly have it we both love having it but i never feel in the mood why
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2005): I don't think you need to worry. If 'one night stands' have been your habit in the past, you've likely just conditioned yourself psychologically to be turned on "by the thrill" or the sexual tension of casual sex. The brain is known as the largest sex organ because of its integral role in sexual arousal. This girl is special and perhaps, you are needing time to adjust your sexual libido to a emotional, committed relationship. In their heads, some guys equate good sex with just plain "f**king...nothing more and that, no emotional attachments and that aspect turns them on. I thinks it's great that you are cuddling and taking the time to become bonded without sex, in the picture. You could try using foreplay and do more exploring with her. Or just a good "necking session" could do it for you. Try using some erotica together (magazines, videos, etc) and see if that helps. All in all...I would be overly concerned, it will come back. Give it time.
...............................
A
female
reader, momma Mare +, writes (2 December 2005):
Dear Young Man,After reading your letter the answer to your question was right infront of you. Welcome to maturity and real feelings. You stated that you like this girl better than any other. You even called her SPECIAL. You said you prefer to cuddle with her. Did you ever think that you respect her? I think you see her as a real person, someone you care about and enjoy spending time with. In your letter you compared this relationship to previous one night stands. I believe you realise there is a big difference between one night stands, where the only reason you are together is for sex, and seeing a girl you really like. Don't be hard on yourself, enjoy the time you spend with this special girl. The most important lesson I ever learned about physical relationships is: there is a very big difference between having sex with someone and making love to someone you really like and care about. Take your time and follow your heart and feelings. I believe as time goes on and your friendship and relationship grows with this young lady so will the passion. Before you even notice your cuddling will evolve into some serious more frequent love making. I wish you all the best.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 December 2005): sex on a one night stand and sex in a relationship are completely differant. a relationship is not just about sex unlike a one night stand. you seem to be learning this as you said you prefer to cuddle with her and she is special. let your attachment grow and see how things develop. there is plenty of time for sex and i am 100% positive you will find the sex with a girl you care about is much better than any one night stand. long term couples rarely have sex every night but the quality makes up for that 10 fold.
...............................
|
