A
female
,
*eorgia
writes: My boyfriend and I have been dating for about eight months now. In the beginning everything was wonderful. Here lately, it's not the same. We go out and still do things together, but he is never affectionate anymore. If I try to hold his hand, or rub his back, or stomach, he tells me to stop. He says that he doesn't like it, that my hands are cold, or that I am annoying him. We don't make love anymore either. He is not in the mood or always has a reason for why we don't. Then he told me today that he had to go to the clinic because he wasn't feeling well, and that they told him how to take care of the problem and he felt better now. When I asked what was wrong, he said the doctor said that he had blue balls and he needed to go home and masturbate, so he did. Please help! I definately don't understand what is happening in my relationship. I could desperately use some good advice.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2007): Communication is the key. You need to talk to him directly. Men do not understand when you talk around the problem so just ask him straight up. It could be lots of reasons. He could be exhausted, tired, depressed, or even not want you anymore. Think positive until you actually find out the truth. Do not over analyze the problem.
If it is because he doesn't want to be with you anymore, just let go and move on. There's a lot of great guys out there!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 August 2006): One of the signs of cheating and/or loss of intrest is lack of wanting to be intimate...hugging, kissing, cuddling, sex.
I suggest you tell him how you are feeling at the moment and ask if there is anything you can do.
If he is still putting you off and not answering or responding to your questions/concerns...just let him go.
*hugs*
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2006): because hes cheating like my boyfriend its catching him at it
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2005): When all of us sense a looming break up (an we've all been there), we often retreat in to denial & confusion and this is why actually being dumped seems like such a shock. But the reality is that anybody who is willing to look can see the writing on the wall long before the relationship actually ends. He is displaying a very common sign and that is, he's emotionally distancing himself from you. It appears you are becoming less and less of a emotional priority, even if the reasons for the distancing seem logical, it is never a good thing for any relationship. Some people may say, he's depressed or he's "pulling away" like some guys do, temporarily. But hun, he's not making love to you and he's seeking a doctor's help to alleviate his discomfort. Why is he doing this when he has you. So we know he isn't having libido problems. When affection and starts to dwindle and lovemaking virtually disappears, it means the fire of love is also going out. When a person gets dumped it feels like their world is closing in to smother them and they wonder if they'll ever feel happy again. The good news is "yes" one day you will feel happy again, you will love again and this loss will become nothing more than a life experience. But when you are in the middle of it, caught in those end days of a once blossoming relationship, it can feel like the confusion will never end. There is no doubt, that a break ups can be harsh but they hurt less if you face facts rather than hide from the truth. Accepting what may be ineviatable, is going to be hurtful and I am sorry for your pain. You will grieve, mourn, accept and recover. It will take time but be true to yourself and stay strong...you will be happy again. Good luck and take care of yourself.
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A
female
reader, sexseahot +, writes (1 November 2005):
I think you should just get rid of him. He obviously don't want you anymore and you don't need to stay around for someone like that. No one deserves such treatment for anyone. He's not telling you straight up how he feels, which he probably should so no one gets confused, but he's not unfortunately.
Let him know how you feel about the situation and that you think that's he not into you anymore and if this is true have him tell you so that you don't have to guess anymore. There's no reason to keep you around if he don't want to be with you. Move on with your life and let him do the same.
There are many more people out there that will want to be with you and be honest about how they feel instead of stringing you along and giving you the cold shoulder.
Good Luck!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 November 2005): He has fallen out of love with you, and is afraid of getting you pregant. Since he is trying to end the relationship gracefully, and failing that, letting you make him the bad guy, he doesn't want to take any chances by making love to you again. Why? You have to talk to him. And be direct. You may not be able to save this relationship, but the answer to " why?" will be an education for you and any future dating you do. Good Luck.
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