A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:Dear Cupid ,I am love with this guy that I have known for many years. We have a daughter together.I broke the relationship off and moved to another state.We talk to one another on the phone from time to time and every time I hear his voice it makes me want to rekindle our love for each other.We talked about him coming to where I live now but his mother keeps putting things in his head telling him he shouldn't visit me and who knows what else she's saying.His mom and I we always have got along with each other but now it seems like she doesn't care for me that much now.Anyway I feel like he is a grown man and his mom needs to allow him to grow up.Now that she talks down on him coming to visit he doesn't 't want to come now.He is the love of my life and I love him and I just don 't understand why would he allow her to come between us no disrespect but I think she needs to get a life.He was my man when I left and he is still mine now.If I have to I will go get him myself. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 February 2013): I truly understand all that has been said my boyfriend is not an angel and his mommy knows this.She just doesn't 't want him to leave her but he has other siblings but he is there for her more like I am for my mom.My Ex knows why we aren't together it's just I have forgiven him now I want us to move on together our daughter is grown now and there are no babies left to raise just us.Hopefully he will make a choice .Thanks
A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (11 February 2013):
 "Momma's boys" are just about the worst kind of partner that a woman could select.....
Sure, she'll pretend that she likes you... but.. in reality, YOU are her competition for her LITTLE BOY... and, as long as "Sonny" is her little boy, YOU DON'T HAVE A CHANCE OF GETTING HIM TO BE YOUR ADULT "BOYFRIEND" OR "PARTNER".....
You can keep trying ..... as you've alluded to in this submittal.... BUT I'm willing to extend you generous odds that no good will come of the tenuous "relationship" thst you can hatch between the two of you.... MOMMA has ALL the trump cards!!!!
Good luck....
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2013): I have to agree with the aunts and uncles post.. His mothers reactions towards you are based upon your own actions... If he was your man .. Then why did you high tail it with his daughter too, to another state. If I were his mother sweetie I would be not happy with you either.. And I would want my son to tread carefully.Now you need to be very sure that what you do feel is love before you get your ex bf hopes up at begin a family again .. If it is love and not just the fantasy of it all. Then your going to have to show your bf and his mum that what you did maybe wasn't the best thing taking his daughter away etc. your going to have to eat humble pie and prove yourselfI do not understand your anger at his mum? I was waiting to read awful things and when I read the post I thought . Come on. His mum is looking after her sons emotional welfare as a mother yourself surely you can see that !!
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (10 February 2013):
 Is it possible he's using his mom as an excuse because he does not want to come himself and is not willing to tell you this?
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (10 February 2013):
I agree completely with male anonymous. You dumped him and took his kid to another state. If that happened to be I wouldn't be very happy. If that happened to my child the last thing I'd want was for them to get hurt again.
Parents (should) care about their children's welfare no matter how old they are. But, they shouldn't control them at all. If they have don't their job properly they should trust their children enough to do the right thing (with some advice of course).
It's possible that this guy is using his mom as a scape goat so he doesn't have to be the one to say "no" to you. In all honesty you sounds kind of controlling, and faced with that people often blame their inaction on someone else, knowing that you're not going to speak to that person.
The bottom line is that if he really loved you and really wanted to be with you he would be there. It could be a number of things other than his mom that are holding him back. Moving? Fear of getting hurt again? Ask him about it. Maybe you need to be the one to move.
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A
female
reader, Atsweet1 +, writes (10 February 2013):
 I acknowledge my mom combination dad because she has great advise she knows when people aren't treating me right. Simply because she didnt treat me right so she knows first hand about abuse of all kind so I listen. What better way to know if somebody is treating you right besides listening to a sadist person who knows pain hurt and so forth. Thats why I acknowlege my mom her advise about love bill relationships add up now and has been proven to example. I used to didnt understand why she did this why she said that its comimg to pass. I damn near have to eat my words sometimes well most of the times. This is why I do his may be similar or different when all fails just ask him.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2013): Maybe his mum is just looking out for him?
Do you know how he handled the break-up? I can't imagine it was a great experience for him to have the woman he loved and his child disappear out of his life. His mum may have been the person he turned to for support.
Perhaps from his mum's perspective she's seen her son hurt and now the woman who did it, wants to be a part of his life again. It should hardly be a shock that she's being protective.
Even if as far as you know the split was amicable, you have no idea of how he was after you left. It's fairly easy to put a brave face on for a phone call, or text nice things.
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A
female
reader, Dayzee  +, writes (10 February 2013):
You said that you think he is a grown man. Well then I suggest you wait and see if that's true. He doesn't need another bossy woman in his life, in fact you want him to break free from a woman telling him what to do' don't you? So let him come to you if he is man enough. If he doesn't come then he isn't. Don't go to him because you'll be living too close to your bf's Mum.
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