A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been seeing this girl for around 2 years. We are both in our mid to late 20´s.The relationship started after we met on our way to work for a long long time. She was seeing someone else at the time which i didnt know about but i thought she was sending signals to me when we crossed paths.The relationship started fine but then i felt some distance appear. After a few months only very few of her friends knew about me and while im not a facebooker and she is an avid user i dont believe i was ever mentioned there.One time while walking close to her work at a weekend afternoon she distanced herself from me as if she didnt want to be seen with me. Then another time we met on our regular route but she was with a work colleague so totally ignored me.I later found out that she was still good friends with her ex. He didnt know about me and what she did with him was none of my business. It didnt matter if I was comfortable with it or not.Later I felt I mattered less to her than her friends. For having fun and listening to she had them. She started planning things and trips with them and I was the last to know.Im not saying I was perfect. I should have had more time.Then she told me how important I was her and all that. I dont think her words matched her behavior.Why does she act like this if she loves me so much?
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male
reader, Tom Obler  +, writes (21 July 2011):
 She is using you as a back up in case the Ex doesn't want her. She hopes things work with the EX and doesn't want to ruin this by introducing you to everyone. I would let her go as soon as possible because she is not treating you with respect. I cannot see a future for you here because really, she wants the Ex so why be second to him? you need a girl that puts you first. If she really meant her words, then she wouldn't give her Ex a moments thought. Alas, she still wants him. Time for you to move on I'm sorry to say.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (21 July 2011):
 Because she thinks there is still a possibility she would get back with her ex but she will say enough sweet things just to keep you there in case her ex doesn't want her.
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