A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Why does my husband after cheating on me and ending the affair makes up stories of girls hitting on him? I used to be jealous before the affair, but I realize I was pushing him away. Now that I changed he makes up stories of girls persuing him. Why?
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 November 2007): Your husband had an affair and you forgave him, then shouldnt he be on his best behaviour? He is talking about girls hitting on him!!! I would be kicking his butt if i were you, which i am not, and sending him packing, never mind trying to get you upset. He should be pampering you. I wouldnt put up with this carry on, he would be out the door and the end of my foot!
take care
xx
A
male
reader, Richard_EMids +, writes (2 November 2007):
Hello. You're saying that your husband had an affair, and now teases you about other women flirting with him!!!! I would call that mental abuse.
Why would he be doing that? There's not an easy answer - but I guess it's some sort of power game. It's taunting. It's a way of telling you he could do it again so easily. Also it might be a way of wearing you down, so that he could have another one in future. Does he feel aggrieved that he had to end the affair? - maybe this is his way of paying you back. It's cruel and vindictive, and not the sort of behaviour from someone trying to show they are sorry.
You obviously didn't want to end the marriage when you found out about the affair. I suppose the question you have to ask yourself is how you should behave in the circumstances - and where this leaves you. Not in a good place that's for sure. I guess you have to reconsider the future -and consider whether you use power as well - which will escalate or try some other ploy. Could I think about this further and come back to you tomorrow.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (2 November 2007):
A little bit of jealousy is cute. You changed. He may feel the changes are due to the affair but in a negative, I don't forgive you sort of way. I'd talk to him about it and let him know that you feel you pushed him away that is why this has stopped.
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