A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: I have been with my boyfriend for a year and a half, and we have always been sexually compatible. However he always wears his shirt and boxers while we have sex. He will take his shirt off if I do it forHim, but it is never something he does on his own. We Will shower together and there is no problem. But if we are messing around in the Shower ans Get out to continue he will put clothes back on to finish In bed. He is no where near over weight. And has nothing to be insecure about. I am just wondering why he does this?
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female
reader, chigirl +, writes (23 January 2013):
Oh yeah, my man is embarrassed about wearing shorts. He wears long pants at the beach even, with swimwear underneath. He's got perfectly fine legs, but you know, it's all in the head. A persons insecurity is all in their head. With encouragement they might feel better, but the only thing that truly helps is for them to work on their self esteem and learn to love themselves for who they are and what they look like. Insecurities are most of the time based on very personal ideas about what they should or shouldn't look like. Doesn't matter if I think my boyfriends legs are normal and look fine, he's still the one who's got the insecurity.
Just this summer he was embarassed to take his shirt off at the beach as well, even though he's one of the most fit men I know. He's a military man after all, they work out and stay in shape. Yet he still was worried about not looking good enough. Insecurities rarely reflect reality.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (23 January 2013):
just because you think he's perfect does not mean he does.
have you ASKED HIM why he does it?
It could be he's insecure
It could be a religious thing
it could be a fetish
maybe he needs to have his clothes on to "finish" some people get used to masturbating a certain way and can only climax in that manner (for example a man who masturbates standing up in the shower most of the time may find it hard to climax lying down)
the only way to know why he needs to do this is to ask him.
IF you can't ask him then you're not close enough to be having sex with him.
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A
male
reader, CMMP +, writes (23 January 2013):
If I had a dollar for every time a woman I was with was insecure about something she had no reason to be then I'd be rich.
Men aren't quite as bad, but we're not immune to insecurities.
I'd ask him why he's keeping them on; maybe you can help him get over it.
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (23 January 2013):
He's embarassed about something. Is there a reason why you haven't just asked him?
My guess is he sweats a lot during sex. Guys tend to do that. And maybe he's self counscious about it. If I'm on top and my man is down under, there will be a nice print of where he's been... just from sweat. And believe me, my boyfriend is the LEAST sweaty man I've been with, he barely has perspiration and barely any odour. Other men I've been with would be soaked and in dire need of a shower after just a quicky.
Sex gets their blood pumping. They sweat. It's normal. But my guess is your guy is totally embarrassed about it. That's why he'll only get naked with you in the shower, because then there's water and you wont notice him sweating.
I also guess he's so embarrassed about it because someone, at some point, made a snide comment about it. Such as a past girlfriend complaining and remarking and saying "eeew". Or maybe even his own family or a friend who'd comment about him easily getting sweaty, or maybe that he stinks etc. My guess is, someone said something nasty, and now he's terrified you will too.
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