A
female
age
30-35,
*ebeccaa
writes:Hello this is going to be quote long so bare with me, my uncle grew up with his vest friend from being a todler they are still bestfriends now. So obviously my mum knows him and his mum and dad and visa versa. At my uncles wedding his best friend who he had grown up with was there he was his best man, and he has three sons the youngest one the same age as me. Me and him were only seven years old but we have pictures of both of us at the wedding. Anyway that was the only time I saw him when I was young as they lived at the other side of town but then moved away miles away. Just recently they moved back to our town, and is literally a ten minute walk from where I live. He moved to te same school as me, I was thenonly perosn he knew. After a few weeks of being at our shook he asked me out I wasn't too keen at first but eventually we went out. Six months down the line and we are very happy together I go to his house bear enough every day I have tea there etc. But the problem is I dont think my mum, dad or uncle is too Lee non the idea of me and him. There are several reasons for this, first my mum is forever moaning at me being at his, I'm only here from about 5 at night till ten becaus ten is the time I have to be home. My mum says if I'm going to be late text her which i do but it's bit often i am late. But now my mum moans I'm never at home and it's not fair i go to there's all the time for tea, but his parents don't mind me being at his they even ask me to bring my sisters, abd invite me every where. My boyfriend is going on holiday in a few months and they asked If I wanted to go. They gave my mum the price of it and my mum told them she couldn't afford it, after I even said I would pay for it as i have money in the bank, but she said that wasnt the problem it was because she didn't know them well enough, bu she's known them her whole life and grew up with them! When he first moved to our school my mum had an idea something was going on between us and she asked my friends and they said no because it was up to me to tell her and my mum said good because she doesn't want me to. My uncle also told my boyfriends mum he thought I would do better than him. My dad is always moaning about how he thinks I don't need him anymore because I've got my boyfriend and I tell him to stop being stupid. My mum says she has no problem with me abd him being together but Inshe doesn't then what is all the fuss about? What do you think have my family hot a problem with it? If so why? And what can I do about it?
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female
reader, Rebeccaa +, writes (7 April 2012):
Rebeccaa is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thankyou for your help,my mum did say she has nothing against him, at that she likes him, but before she said that, she said she was going to have a word with his parents. So bacicbasicly she contradicted what she said, i really dont understand her at all. It is mainly it seems that my mum has the problems.
A
female
reader, answerfromtheheart  +, writes (7 April 2012):
 There might be something that the parents know about his family that you are unaware of and that is the reason why they are against your relationship. Something like: "A bad apple doesn't fall too far from the tree". So in their own way they are trying to protect you.
Although sometimes that is true, a family's character directs who their children are as people, it's not always the case. think of Romeo and Juliete. Families hated each other but their kids only had love.
In reality, however, it is very difficult to make a marriage work if the families are not approving of each other. It puts a lot of unnecessary pressure on both of you. In a good marriage there are issues, so the support of a family is important. And if your support system will be against you, it will make your life difficult.
I would try to sit your family down and tell you the truth about why they are against you seeing him. Or talk to each family member separately and see if each story is the same.
get to the bottom of why there is a dislike toward him
Good luck.
Let us know what happens.
I think it will be something very interesting.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2012): They DO have issues with the relationship. Of course they do.This isn't just an older guy to them. This is their friend and they might see this as a kind of betrayal of their trust.I'm not saying it's right. But is is natural. It will take much more time for them to accept you two as an item.Look, you like the guy, he likes you, you are both adults and you get along with his family... there isn't much more you can do other than keep that Olive branch extended and hope that eventually your family takes it and moves on.Just try to be courteous with your family, but don't bow down to them. You are an adult and have no legal obligation anymore to follow their orders, or even put up with their curfews.It's time to act like a grown-up, which is what you are legally.Flynn 24
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