A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I've been at my current job for 10 months now and the people i work with are lovely. Recently on a night out 1 of the girls-who at work is 1 of the most helpful and nicest people you could meet turned in to a really rude person! We went out for a meal-the whole team a few months back and she was sat next to me and had her back to me all night long and didnt speak to me once.I thought this odd as that day at work she was normal. The following week at work she was as nice as pie. So i thought nothing of it. Now last week we went out again as a team for our xmas party and once again she completely ignored me. I went over to make conversation and she just couldnt be bothered with me but the next day at work she was fine!She hadnt been drinking on either occasion so i cant blame the alchol. I did ask if she was ok and had i upset the following day and she said no and that she did talk to me!!!Why is she like this??
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 January 2009): she's madly, deeply in LOVE with you!!! i also act that way... seriously speaking when i read your question i was amazed that this things really happening... we really cannot act normal,(don't know why?) just pretend to be snob, quiet... coz were thinking a lot.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2008): Thanks guys. I will be more wary of her in future when we go out. Work wise i'll just act normal towards her as she hasnt done anything horrible to me in the workplace.
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A
male
reader, Hrywnak +, writes (24 December 2008):
well it is possible that some people put on a pseudo-personality whilst at work, it can help them to get on with people better and make working life easier.
there's a chance she doesn't really find you interesting or your type of friend.
i recently finished working in a bar for about 2 years and there was a huge amount of two-faced people working there, people who came alive outside of work and vice-versa. don't take it personally unless she actually disrespects you directly or with someone else.
i find it's best to withdraw yourself slightly when having a conversation with a work colleague who is like this, so that you don't feel hurt when they decide to have personality dis-orders on you.
my old manager would never fully engage you at work just simply make polite chit-chat but outside of work it got round she would happily slag others off and think of them as lesser type of people. i also had a couple of friends who were friends in work only, i wouldn't socialize with them outside of work even though we often arranged to, we both knew where we stood and we had a good relationship regardless in work.
i would say don't push it unless you fully know why she is acting like this and if she means it or not, maybe talk to some other colleagues to get their opinion
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