A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My girlfriend of 3 years broke up with me about 2 months ago, saying she felt like we'd grown apart and the relationship had run its course. We tried for two weeks before the final breakup to sort it out, having alot of fun but it only ever deep down felt like friends.So, I asked her if she wanted to come out for a catch up after 6 weeks, she said she wasnt ready, eventually saying that she didnt want me to think that anything could happen between us again. That hurt, but I accepted it and said well a catch up as just friends would be nice, and asked her to let me know when she wants too. A week later its my birthday. I didnt even get a text from her, bearing in mind she said she still loved me and cared for me when we broke up, and a couple of weeks later said the same, again that hurt. Since the breakup she's been out all the time, updating her myspace with all the pictures and really rubbing it in that she's so happy and enjoying herself. Its making me feel really low, and hurt, that the relationship seemingly meant nothing to her, and she seems to be so happy and hasnt even looked back or considered how hard its making it for me...Why is she doing this? Is she fake here or what?Help please :(
View related questions:
broke up, my ex, myspace, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 April 2008): She may appear to be happy, and she just might be, or, she is keeping herself busy to take her pain off her mind. Keeping busy is one of the top ways to keep troubles away.
Don't think she is doing this to hurt you or rub it in your face, she is trying to heal from the breakup, no doubt it hurt her.
For you and her, you need to give her space and move on yourself.
If you can look back at the relationship and review all that happened, the good and the bad, and then understand why things happened and how it fell apart, then you can work on those things to improve upon them, if any, and be ready for someone in the future. If you change for the better, you'll be much happier.
A
female
reader, peaches83 +, writes (7 April 2008):
 Shes probably finding the best way for her to get over this. So by going out and acting free and single etc and making everything seem like she is totally happy is her way or dealing with it. I wouldnt read anything into it. Maybe you should try the same thing.
Theres nothing a woman dislikes more than a man that seems to be feeling sorry for himself.
Maybe going out and enjoying yourself will bring you happiness again too.
...............................
A
female
reader, superbunny +, writes (7 April 2008):
 To be honest, sweetie, I think she's doing the whole photo thing to try to make a point.. I know I did when I broke up from my long-term boyfriend. I don't think it's trying to get at you. It's trying to convince herself + put on a face that she is happy. I'm not saying that anything's necessarily going to happen again but you're both obviously dealing in different ways. She obviously has distractions like going out with her mates and whatever, while you're still a little hung up on her.
Even though the relationship has ended, it doesn't mean it's wrong for her to still have feeling for you or vice versa - you were together for two years of your life.
The only thing I can suggest is going out with your friends and trying to forget about her a bit. Maybe it would be better to cool off completely for a bit, like not have any contact then gradually over time work on your friendship when you're not feeling so sore from the relationship.
I hope this helps, best wishes. =] x
...............................
A
female
reader, I care  +, writes (7 April 2008):
 Aw my heart goes out to you break ups are really hard on everyone that's at the other end of it all. To me it sounds like you are still in love with her more than a friend and that's why it hurts so much but over time the pain will ease up I asure you. I don't think she means to rub her happiness in your face I just think she has excepted the relationship has ened and moved on before you were even aware anything was wrong. It's not going to be easy for you to move on but you have to try and occupy your time and mind with other things that you enjoy and begin to make your self happy again.And you shouldn't feel low about your self you seem like a very nice person and some day the right woman will come along.All the best and hang in there.
...............................
|
