A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hey, I have this issue.... my boyfriend and i were friends for two years then we started dating and after 3 months (something like that) we became officially boy and girl and after 2 months he broke up with me and after one month he talked to me and he told me that he found that he was never in love with me and i told that i found that too ( that am not in love with him, i thought that!)... i was really happy that we got back together as friends but he acts really strange when we go out with people we don't know we act like we are still together but when he hang out with our group (our friends)we act like we just friends and we might not talk at all !!! don't know what to think! are we still in love with each other or what ?? why we act like that ???HELP
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 July 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthnx :))but you know i met a new boy and he was with me and he started acting as if am with him ! and to be honest i liked it ! but we didn't talk for a whole month maybe he really don't love me but why everyone around us (who don't know us very well) says that he likes me and its obvious and if doesn't love me why he acts differently e when there is new people (to be honest we both act different , when there is new friends we act differently from when we hang out with our friends)!! its so confusing !! i just wanna know the truth !
A
male
reader, Wheeler  +, writes (2 July 2011):
 This is happening because the lines between friendship and relationship have been blurred. It is likely that there are still feelings that sometimes resurface.
Part of the problem is that when you are in a relationship you discuss with each other what you are thinking and feeling. You also are around each other enough to notice changes in attitude or behavior. And you have a responsibility to explain things to one another.
Now that you are no longer dating, you don't have nearly as much communication, so it is harder for you to figure out what he is thinking, or why he is thinking it. It is hard to say whether you are in LOVE with each other anyway, as you both said that you were never really in love with each other. I get the impression that maybe you did feel like you were in love with him? I say that because you said, "[I] am not in love with him, I thought that!"
Did you say you were not in love with him as a response or reaction to what he said? Or did I misunderstand that? If it is the case that you are or were in love with him then you are probably analyzing everything a lot more than he is. He may not be thinking about any of this.
When the two of you go out together, and are around people you don't know, it is understandable that you would gravitate to each other. This allows you to handle interaction with others however you want. If someone approaches you that you don't want to talk to, you can say you are there with your boyfriend. If someone approaches that you are interested in, you can say you are just there with a friend.
There are several possible reasons why you act differently among your friends. You don't want to deal with all of the questions and teasing (if that takes place) by friends. Maybe you like having a secret ongoing relationship? Maybe part of you still wants the affirmation of being seen among your friends as a couple in some way?
If it continues to bother you then maybe you should tell him. Tell him what is confusing you about the current situation, and if something hurts your feelings then he should know.
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