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female
,
anonymous
writes: Why do western women hate it when their husband is close to his mother? Isn't that selfish? How can you hate the women who brought him into the world and raised him? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, MagR  +, writes (7 October 2011):
I'm a asian and please let me tell you that the situation is not any different for asian women. In fact, I think it is the case for almost 90% of women worldwide. Why go far, I'm sure our own mother-in-laws would have hated their mother-in-laws.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2007): Because they have too few kids, and try to remain mother to son all his life. Also they are living longer these days(Mother in laws) and therefore the DIL can look forward to being treated like a child until she is 60. I think the mother in law is jealous of the new family being formed too. She wants to keep her boys and her own family as thee family, and resents new families being formed. She is no longer the head of a family, and so she tries to interfere and breakup marriages of sons to bring her nice little family back together. Just my thoughts. Daughters are too independant to let Daddy's do the same thing.
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A
female
reader, willywombat  +, writes (26 June 2006):
 She actually sounds as if she has serious mental health problems...is she under the care of a professional?
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 June 2006): Now there's a question!! I can only speak for myself but my mother in law is evil personified. After her husband died she made a feeble attempt at suicide, upsetting everyone including her three sons, one of whom already suffered severe depression and ultimately killed himself. She then made another attempt and had she done it properly my husband, her youngest son, would have found her hanging there. She insists on laying all her problems, physical and mental on my husband when she should be protecting her children. He visits her every weekend which means we have no quality time together as he's always anxious about going to see her and goes in a weird mood. She is a bitter twisted person who can't bear it if people aren't just like her or suffering like her. Believe me, over the years I've tried to tolerate it but she has her apron strings (emotional blackmail in other words) tied tightly round my husband and we will never have a life of our own as long as she exists. Any advice would be very welcome, I'm at the end of the road with this and am going to walk away soon.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 June 2006): [laughs] Seems like a lot of aunts wishes to come to Canada lately... Must be the good beer and the legendary sasquatch that makes it so attractive... [wink]
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A
female
reader, willywombat +, writes (23 June 2006):
*thinks* how much is a plane ticket to Canada??
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2006): If you sit on my lap, let me pat you, and read you a bedtime story, I can be whatever you want... 8]
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A
female
reader, willywombat +, writes (23 June 2006):
Will you be my new mother in law then martini??
*thinks, need to stop drinking the vodka now*
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2006): Willywombat, you're so cute when you rant... 8]
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A
female
reader, carebear +, writes (23 June 2006):
 ah willywombat this post was just for you lol
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A
female
reader, bonym +, writes (23 June 2006):
 Are you not making a bit of a generalisation when you say western women, its not the case for all western women you know!! Its not a case of hating the woman who brought you into the world but for some, it may be that they think that their husband is too close to their mumand instead should be closer to them. xXx
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A
female
reader, willywombat +, writes (23 June 2006):
I hate my Mum-in-law. BUT, please see this from the point of view of a person who tried DESPERATELY to be liked, or even tolerated by her. She plays mind games, she has assaulted me and she has treated my 6 year old son badly as well. Ma-in-law stirs trouble and creates chaos wherever she goes. IF she had been (I hate to use this phrase) a normal individual with out any issues or problems regarding me it would have worked between us. She will not accept me for who I am, and everything was ticking along, albeit with an undercurrant. Each time she flipped I walked away. Then after 6 years I fought back (which is much more in keeping with my personality!!). I thought *stuff this keeping the peace lark* I am gonna get my spine back. She didn't like that. But you know what, I don't care anymore!! Really!
She has lost what could have been a very rewarding and enriching relationship with a daughter in law, son and grandson. Her loss. All because she likes to pick fights and enjoys a drama (even when one doesn't exsist).
so IT WOULD BE UNFAIR TO SAY THAT ALL WESTERN WOMEN HATE THEIR MA-IN-LAWS. Maybe it could be re[hrsed, why do western mother's in law treat their daughters in law so badly??!!
*sits back exhausted after rant*
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (23 June 2006): You have a son don't you? Many mother of sons are nosey, interferring busy bodies who think that no woman is good enough for their son. Many mother of sons are absolutely lovely. Women should love their sons and accept the women they choose to love.
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A
female
reader, Smiler +, writes (23 June 2006):
 Hey Sweetie
Women typically complain that their mothers-in-law interferes in domestic situations, spoils their sons and expected them to perform traditional "wifely" roles while ignoring their professional status outside the home. A friend of mine once said a visit from the mother-in-law often had the effect of turning the husband into a "Stone Age" male who expected his wife to be a housemaid. But despite the stereotype it is women, not men, who have most trouble with their spouses mothers. My own personal tips would include keeping calm, giving the mother-in-law specific tasks to do so that she feels useful and avoiding heavy discussions about family relationships.
I hope my advice was of some help to you sweetie :o) good luck ok... If you ever need someoe to talk to or just a shoulder to cry on or maybe a little more advice, truely i'm always here for you ok :o) don't hesitate to email me i'm always here for you ok.
You Take Care Sweetie X
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (23 June 2006):
 I think that is an exaggeration...I have a fantastic relationship with my mother in law and it is far better than my relationship with my own mother! I think some partners (male and female) from any part of the globe will resent the attention their other half gives to their parents. It also depends on the in-laws really and their personality - not every wife in the western world is so awful! I personally like the fact my husband is close to his mother - she reminds him to be nice to me!
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