A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi,Why do many girls I have dated, and we both like each other a lot, go cold, all stops, but want to stay in touch as friends? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 August 2013): Not me, i dont stay friends regardless of how well the breakup went....but I believe that may not be the norm.... Im middle aged and had many many many boyfriends plenty that i like but have not kept in touch or as a friend never felt the need.....
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (12 August 2013):
 because staying "friends" means you did not FAIL at a relationship.... "see we like each other but there was no sexual chemistry so we parted on good terms as friends"
it's the way to ease their guilt.
just say NO when they say "we can still be friends" they will whine and cry and feel bad and get over it...
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A
female
reader, MsSadie +, writes (11 August 2013):
 Because we women often like to believe that we can be friends with men as easily as we can be friends with other women. Plus, it's nice to have a little testosterone in our lives, and the influence and opinions of men are welcomed fresh perspectives from those of our girl friends.
WiseOwlE also made the very good point that sometimes exes say that you should remain friends as a clean, positive way to end a romantic relationship. In fact, I said that to a guy who I "let go" very recently. The truth is that he really does have the kind of qualities that I appreciate in a person and we had some great conversations, but I wasn't that attracted to him physically or romantically and he came from a lifestyle that I just didn't jive with. If he were to call and ask to hang out as friends, I'd totally say yes. Unfortunately, I doubt I'll ever see him again because what he wants from a relationship with me (love and sex) is not something that I want to share with him, and I don't think he's willing to compromise. I wouldn't be the one to initiate contact between us because I don't want to lead him on.
So, don't read too much into it. If you think that you're capable of being "just friends" with a woman and you can easily get over the heartbreak of rejection, then I invite you to accept an ex's offer of friendship. Otherwise, just walk away.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2013): Often people feel an obligation to make a gesture of goodwill to indicate there are no hard-feelings.
It is often to ease their guilt, if they initiated the breakup. If you initiated the breakup, they may still be hanging on in the hope there may be a future reconciliation.
The truth in most cases, is that friendship can only be successful; once everyone is over the breakup.
That means no one feels any of the original passion and attraction, and have essentially moved on. Women are more likely to want to continue emotional ties of some sort; because they can be emotional creatures. They want to show that the relationship had some meaning.
You also have to take into account, they may offer friendship out of fear of retaliation for not reversing their decision to breakup with you.
There is also the offer of friendship when it is determined that there was no other type of chemistry; however, they maintain a fondness, and see you as a good person.
It usually isn't what you really want. I would advise that everyone leave on good terms, never to look back.
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A
male
reader, Pac-Man18 +, writes (11 August 2013):
cause ur not aggressive enough in how u make ur moves be bold. keep em interested
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