A
male
age
36-40,
*yan2175
writes:*OP's own title*Why do some ladies judge men on how long they can last during sex? I mean me as a young man all I want to do is try and please a woman to the best I can. When they say something like that its really upsets me (example: "haha he doesn't last very long how sad"). I feel as if I gave it everything I had, to do what they want and that just wasn't enough. Now they are just going to laugh at my attempt.. Now I am a virgin so I don't know a whole lot about this.. but I do understand that women can orgasm multiple times back to back.. pretty much its just they don't have to start all over or goes as far back on the meter as guys do after they cum... and like this entire thing is making me feel terribly sad.. but ladies if you answer this don't lie to me tell me the truth.. is it really that important? and even though you can have multiple do you want to? Also since you can have multiple is that why guys have to last so long? Just another thing like I am not worried about not lasting 20 mins just like some girls make it sound as if they don't want you the guy to EVER cum and just go all day.. I'm sorry this is so long I hope I made my point clear enough.. I tried to bring out everything in my head just in words that people can understand..
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male
reader, Ryan2175 +, writes (25 March 2010):
Ryan2175 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionNot My Name, Thank you very much for your answer that was very comforting. I think I am just worrying about something that might not ever happen..
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (24 March 2010):
 Hi, I didn't have time to answer this morning. It's important that a man lasts long. It's a male's need to feel in control so when a man can control when he cums a woman feels he's good at what he's doing. I feel desired that a man wants to please me that much. It makes me feel like they are not doing this just for the sake of releasing tension, using a woman's body as a tool. There's a big big difference between a quickie and a 40 minute long session, with a lot of foreplay included of course. Think about comparing an appertizer to a big entree. While I wouldn't say "how sad!", I would say "it's okay, let's just take a rest for now" (that's if after you came, implying I want more, at the same time disappointed.)I don't know if every man is biologically equipped to last long, just like I don't know if every woman can squirt. It's important to look for a woman who loves you though. But you are fooling yourself if you think if a woman loves you, loyal to you then there's no need to brush up you skills, whether your woman is experienced or not.
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A
female
reader, Not My Name  +, writes (24 March 2010):
 Well, yeah, being sexually satisfied by a partner is important, ...and if I can be satisfied several time even better lol. That said, I don't always orgasm every time I have sex, ..other times I have multiples. Guess it balances it out in the end :-) I can still enjoy the feeling of sex without an orgasm, .. I just would not want it to not get there a fair portion of the time.
I am not tho the type of person who would ridicule a man's performance - that is just mean and nasty on a basic human level, ..and on a biological or psychological one, in most cases there are pretty good reasons for it that can be worked on. I've had a couple of partners that got my head ticking in the prob dept initially but turned out to be nothing but nerves/performance anxiety that was overcome coz I was willing to stick it out, make them feel comfortbale and give them a chance to get past it.
There is a diff tho in being unable to help making a factual observation, ... and judging - as in making a negative association in a derogative manner. Don;t confuse the two.
Most women are not wanting guys to last so long they just about can't cum tho. Actually, that often makes women feel insecure and like they are not pleasuring their men. If you pleasure a woman first orally or manually tho, most wont care how long the intercourse goes for. Seriously 5 min would be fine if you have got them over the line already.
I am lucky I suppose that I can orgasm from intercourse alone since a lot of women can't, ... and 20 min's would be likely to have gotten me off a few times, ... but most women don't orgasm from penetration alone(hence why we bitch up about foreplay lol) so 20 minutes would probably be pushing the interest level for a lot of females and they would rather it be a bit quicker than that - ideally having already be satisfied by another means.
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A
male
reader, baddogbj  +, writes (24 March 2010):
 The secret here, particularly if you aren't very experienced, is to keep your dick off the field of play for as long as possible. Your mouth and hands - her mouth, face, neck, nipples, under the breasts, tummy button, hips, thighs, into the pussy, long licks top to bottom and then 15 minutes at least doing the best you can with your tongue. By the time that you get around to even bringing your dick into play she's already very happy and if you are a little over enthusiastic and over and done in 5 minutes, she ISN'T going to care.
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