A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Why is that i get so jealous even when he is visiting his own mother? We have been dating for 7 months now and he happens to be devoiced and he is 12 older then me. Can it be that im afraid he might run into his ex wife, even if she is not in the country, or dont i have enough self esteem in myself? I know i can be very nasty when he is always busy with work and visiting friends to relax his mind, its as if he wants me around but does not tell me its as if i have to guess. Often enough he askes me why i disappeared well we were at someone, he is just not himself when we are around his friends, like he will put me side and just leave me there, or does not want to hold my hand or a soft kiss on the cheek like when we are alone in a public place, am i missing something or im a just a very jealous pearson and dont want to share him with anyone?
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ex-wife, his ex, jealous, self esteem Reply to this Question
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female
reader, the1st1  +, writes (30 December 2008):
well the whole mother part, (if they are close) you probably subconciously think that she will take him away. and i dont mean that in a perverted way. and the whole being different around friends, its because he doesnt want to let his friends know that he is lovey dovey... a lot of guys do it, even at older ages, and its because they think that have to be someone that they arent around there friends because they are afraid to be made fun of, but reality is, that if they make fun of him for showing his girl affection, then they arent real friends. if i were you i would find someone that is the same no matter what, i mean we all have our times, but it shouldnt be like that. not even around his friends.
A
female
reader, prenezmoila +, writes (29 December 2008):
 The best thing to do in this situation is to first analyze cognitively for yourself what's going on. Is he really doing anything wrong or are you just sensitive to his interactions with other women? Jealousy affects all of us, and while is occasionally there for a reason, often just adds unnecessary tension to a relationship.
Either way, talk to him about it. Communication is always key. If you feel uncomfortable bringing it up, step lightly into the situation by asking him how he feels. Though your feelings definitely matter, maybe he just isn't as comfortable about displaying his affections for you in public, and it could have nothing at all to do with you. I know that I hate PDA's with people I'm involved with, and it's not that I'm ashamed or find them unattractive or undesirable, it's that I don't like making a possessive statement such as that in front of people.
Small kisses and hand holding shouldn't be a big deal, but as I said, they may be a big deal to him. Basically, what you should do in the end is talk to him. Find out what's going on in his mind. If he doesn't give you a clear answer, you need to re-examine your relationship as a whole.
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