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age
30-35,
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writes: Guys, what goes through your mind when you meet a new girl and only want to sleep with her? Why do guys I meet only want or try to sleep with me? I met a couple of guys from club online and even "friends of friends". Their only motive is to get into my pants. I don't think i send out mix signals that I want to sleep with them. It's mostly proper dinner (at first) and i won't get too touchy with them(but we do flirt). If its in clubs, i enjoy crazy dancing with my girlfriends and show no interest in them.I would say I'm not very pretty, kinda flat chested too. why do i always seem to meet jerks who only wants to sleep with me?I've read up on "Signs he only wants sex", all boxes are checked, so don't come saying I'm thinking to much. Please "enlighten" me!
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female
reader, Fender  +, writes (5 December 2012):
Just Help Me Again your comment "A lot of girls in bars and clubs do just want sex from a guy. ' to me was somewhat sexist. I am girl and i know many other that do go to clubs, bars, pub. I will admit there maybe and odd few. Whom prob need to a good laid. However most of us are there for a good time, to hangout with out friends and dance crazy. hey if your a good catch i be open. but i do get sick and tired of drunk guy putting offensive move me after i caught them, trying hit all the girls in the place.
But u do make a good point in saying we can change the situations. Few some guys came on my a mate their so wasted we have drive them home. we stay n talked only as we said that all we be doing.after the guy came our room with his fly undone and asking why are we naked. I said put pull ur pants up not gonna happen not that kinda girl.
A
male
reader, JustHelpinAgain  +, writes (30 November 2012):
Maybe its your perception that every guy only wants to get in your pants? You can control situations as well, what you do and talk about when you meet a guy. And a lot of girls in bars and clubs do just want sex from a guy. And some guy may be testing how "easy" you are. Better to meet guys in more normal surrounds where there isnt pressure to "pair up".
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2012): The answer is in your post OP. You're looking in the WRONG place for a genuine guy.
Obviously its going to be easier to pull a guy who frequents night clubs, but if you think you're going to find prince charming among them, think again! Guys only visit night clubs to get drunk and pull a one night lover, and assume the same about girls who frequent clubs - that they're easy and just out for a pull too.
You will know if a guy is worth your time, because he will be past all that immature "clubbing for a one night stand" phase, and will be ready to settle down. Maybe try getting a hobby or a pass time, and meet a guy who shares the same interests as you. They don't say "its best having things in common with someone" for nothing OP.
As for not giving guys the impression you want sex, well, let's be honest, they DIDN'T force you into bed, you did that yourself quite willingly. If you want to give the impression you're not easy, then you should really say:
"Look, I'm liking you but I'm NOT easy like that. Wait until we see where things go eg: we become an item before we have sex. If that's not good enough, show yourself out!".
It would be wise also to do this if you meet a guy you think maybe a genuine one. If you jump into bed with him as soon as you meet, that's likely only gonna make him think you must be as easy with everyone you meet. That IS one of the/if not "The" biggest put off(s) for a genuine guy looking for a genuine girl.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2012): "Guys, what goes through your mind when you meet a new girl and only want to sleep with her?"
I only want sex and it looks like this girl will give me that.
"Why do guys I meet only want or try to sleep with me?" A lot of guys are like that but not all of us. Maybe it's just your choice in men, maybe you give it up too easily. Most likely though it's a simple matter of luck and numbers. Most women meet lots of guys who only want to sleep with them.
"I would say I'm not very pretty, kinda flat chested too."
It's nothing to do with that, you're obviously pretty if they want to sleep with you OP. they wouldn't even approach you if they weren't.
OP signs he only wants sex are bullshit. Stop reading signs and just do this properly. Believe it or not any guy who wants to date you does want to have sex with you too you know. They're not meeting you to make a new friend. Sex is something they will want to do with at some point, it doesn't mean they only want sex.
Just date, go for dinners, have fun with them and give them more time to prove to you that sex is not the only thing they want. Signs are bullshit, the only real proof is getting to know someone in the long run. It's not unsual for a guy to get a bit frisky on a date OP, as long as he respects you when you say no or you want to get to know him first then there is nothing wrong with that.
Why would a guy date you if he didn't find you sexually attractive?
Stop ticking boxes in some article, and find out yourself, just be smart and safe about things. Give guys a chance to show you what they're after. A guy only after sex won't hang around long without it, so make every guy wait.
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