A
female
age
26-29,
*arahbeara23
writes:Why why why.... Okay guys why would you tell a girl you like her. Cuddle with her. Kiss her or even try kissing her. Then tell her that you dont want to be more then friends this has happened to me in more then one account and im getting quite sick of it. Can someone please tell me why on earth this keeps happeneing!
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (1 February 2016):
 Well you had doubts at one point and you overcame them, so maybe now he has doubts the same as you did. There could be a number of reasons why he done it, when you told him that maybe it wasn't a good idea maybe that got him thinking that you where right and the friendship is more important than that.
A
female
reader, sarahbeara23 +, writes (31 January 2016):
sarahbeara23 is verified as being by the original poster of the questioneveryone who keeps saying its because im not setting the boundaries, well thats just thing. One of the guys who did this to me. was one of my bestfriends. he admitted to me he had a crush on me the past few years and went to kiss me... when i didnt kiss him back he looked puzzled and asked me why. I told him i didnt know if it was a good idea. And that i'd be lying if I were to say if ive never had feelings for him. So we agreed it wasnt right for him to try and kiss me and to try and take things slowly... and I started to fall for him and when I felt comfortable telling him that finally after a few weeks of talking about the idea of potentially going on a date he tells me its not a good idea... why would a guy do something like that...
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A
male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (27 January 2016):
 Sarah: This interesting phenomenon that you have before you is known as an "intimacy reversal"..... We guys prefer to NOT try to get you (girls) to put out.... but - instead - for you (girls) to initiate that you actually WANT to put out.
We do it to avoid rejection... AND to confirm that we are going to "get a little" from you... all, at no risk...
YOU can handle it as you wish....
Good luck...
P.S. I prefer the "So, do you want to go out to Makeout Point to watch submarine races... or not?" approach... tho'... I must admit,... it's never been very successful for me!!!!!
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (27 January 2016):
Sometimes guys just want a fling, so they will tell you anything so that they can get close to you. Have these guys ever suggested more than just kissing and cuddling? You will find there are a lot of people out there who are young and just want to have some fun.
Don't take it personally, we all have to kiss a few frogs before we find our prince charming. Just make them wait a while before you are affectionate with them and see if they will wait around for you.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (27 January 2016):
 Why do they do it? Because you don't set boundaries. And I think because they ARE testing your boundaries. If you are willing to cuddle, to kiss... well, maybe you are willing to do more without them having to put forth the effort of dating you.
I'd say kissing and cuddling don't really belong in a male/female friendship - but it's kind of part of "courtship".
If you in your mind say that kissing and cuddling are for people who are dating/married/engaged - then you won't be cuddling a guy who isn't your BF. Just because he says he likes you doesn't mean you somehow OWE him kisses or cuddles. If they think you aren't "good enough" to date - then they aren't "good enough" to cuddle and kiss...
So unless you have been on a couple of dates with a guy or dated him a while, don't cuddle.
I AM NOT saying it's ALL your fault, don't take it that way, please. But some guys (specially the immature ones) will take a mile if you give them an inch.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 January 2016): It happened to me once. I am sure that in my case the guy was not that into me and I was a good friend of his best friend so it was complicated.
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