A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Never had a boyfriend and I'm 20 I feel so alone and depressed because I'm at the end of my rope. I've been kissed I've had sex with guys they never seem to want more than that from me. I watch everyone I know go through relationships: love, loss and I have nothing. The only thing I can think of is there is something wrong with me. What can I do to make it right to fix what guys hate about me?
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female
reader, nokutenda  +, writes (5 February 2009):
don't give in to sex easily, let the man fall in love first
A
male
reader, DoubleM +, writes (5 February 2009):
 In my opinion, you are probably just giving it away too quickly.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 February 2009): Maybe you are picking the men who don't want to commit thus can't offer a relationship or you send off an unwanted message, that you are also after no strings sex! Select your partners more carefully from now on and have sex when you are in a commited relation. At this point you have certain trust issues which are pushing you to look for sympathy and affection but you will not find either in the arms of passing lovers who use you: in fact you use each other but it's you who you are left with a bitter taste and yet poorer self esteem when they leave. Look at your needs, think earnestly how you want to be and how you wish to be seen so stop sending wrong messages and start building your confidence! You are closer to this aim once you make a firm decision and start loving who you are because it's you who doesn't love the sight of yourself now. Pay special attention to the weakness that leads you to poor choices, you may need help in analysing the root of your issues! People learn from their mistakes at all ages so don't be ashamed of yours, what you do in the near future is what matters now, so start by setting small goals for yourself and be proud that you are setting and fulfilling them. Don't feel like you should have to justify yourself when sex is discussed in a premature stage when you don't know the other person well, but instead start demanding that you are taken on dates, that you talk and get to know more about each other so you can love the personality and the character before you are intimate with the person. A man will be very pleased in engaging in the seduction process trying to win you over so allow him this pleasure. Meanwhile you can examine what you dislike about yourself and grow in those departments by searching for new ideas that help you become the best version of who you are. Create the life you want.
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A
male
reader, Love is great  +, writes (5 February 2009):
I dont think guys hate you if not they will not be having sex with you, right?Guys nowadays only have one thing in mind,sex,sex,sex....Please dont get me wrong sex is great even greater if it is done with love not lust.the point here is do not give up, love will come eventually,Sex is not a barometer to love, just take it easy next time........commitment is a word that most man are fearful.the choice is yours you control the man, when you play hard to get, they will pursue you until they fall in love with you believe me on this.
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A
female
reader, uluvme0723 +, writes (5 February 2009):
 First off...chill. I'm in the same predicament. And I know its killing you. But first you have to work on you. Work on your life, and your happiness. Just focus on bettering yourself, and I promise things will fall into place. And about the sex thing. Hold out from having sex until your in a committed relationship. Its going to be hard, but you can do it. Don't just let a guy tell you what ever. Make him show and prove.
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