A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Alright, so I'm wondering what to do about this.I have been sort of going with a girl lately, we arn't dating, but we like each other alot, we talk all the time, we hook up on weekends, we act like we're dating.I was going to ask her out, but the last couple weeks she's been acting weird.She has blown me off twice now, getting me to call at a certain hour so we can arrange to meet up, then I'd call and she wouldn't be there...Well Saturday I called the place she's staying about two hours after she told me to (I called when she asked too, but there was no answer) anyways, I was really drunk when I called, and I don't remember what it was I said.But her friends brother picked up, and he told me she was gone out (I wasn't sure to believe him, this guy is always lying about her being gone out when I call), so I kept asking if she was actually gone out of if he was just lying to me, and he insisted she had gone out.And I don't know but I may have called back again later that night, I've got no memory of it.Well today in school (she sits by me in class), she paid very little attention to me, and instead she kept flirting with some other guy in the class, she was tickling him, she was even resting her feet on him, and while she was doing all this she just kept looking at me.I didn't say anything, I was just pissed off about it so I kept to myself, I figured maybe I deserved it.Well on the way out of class I was the last person leaving and she waited for me to walk out of class with me, so we joked around leaving the building, until I made a joke and she took it seriously and gave me a really dirty look, then she didn't say anything for the next few minutes, not even goodbye.Anyhow, just minutes ago on MSN I said "Hey, whats up?" and her reply was "sorry, gtg:("... and then i said ok, and she said "aha bye:)"I know she didn't actually sign off though, she just blocked me because she's still on Myspace.Any advice on what I should do here, all the girls I end up having a thing with start messing with me like this and I still haven't figured out why or what to do about it.Do I bring up the phone call? Should I ask if she's mad at me? Should I tell her I'll quit drinking? (I know she doesn't like me drinking, and I get drunk almost daily, I'm quitting now though),Or do I accept the fact she wants nothing to do with me?... I really appreciate any advice you have, thanks.
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male
reader, Cardigan  +, writes (12 January 2008):
The first step to working out this problem is to quit with the drinking. You cannot see what is really going on if you are looking through a bottle.
With this girl in particular you need to let her go from your concerns for the time being. In the future maybe there will be something there and maybe not, but you can worry about that when the time comes.
With all the other girls I do not think they are so much messing with you as they, like you, are doing what is appropriate for the age. You are testing the emotional boundaries outside of your immediate family and it can appear to be dangerous and scary territory. Don't worry though because you will do just fine as millions before you have and millions after you will. You have more emotional strength within yourself than you realize but you cannot recognize it until you exercise it.
Take care.
A
female
reader, mizzbrannon +, writes (12 January 2008):
You need to forget about her and move one. Her flirting with other guys infront of you is just childish an she is probably just trying to get you jealous.You should do the samething but dont be mean. You should flirt with other girls and stuff or just talk to them it will make her mad. when she's talking to you dont really pay attention but respond to her questions but say what did you say or can you repeat that. She will get really aggrivated. or if she comes to sit by you get up and move some where else and it is a good thing that you're are starting to stop drinking keep up the work.
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A
female
reader, Aunty Katie  +, writes (9 January 2008):
personally forget her! move on, it could be either shes trying to make you jelouse which is pathetic and childish in which case you can do better, or she is a lier and you cant trust a girl who lies and is that devious! just forget her move one and find a nice girl who treats you better than that, myadvice is to completely ignore her, if she likes you will keep trying to get ya back, if not then she never was yours to start with! dont be mean say hi if she talks, but dont pay attention to her she will get fed up faster than you will trust me!
Good luck love :D xx
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