A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Let me give you some background first. We met and spent everyday together and because of our jobs we moved to different states. We talked everyday and rarely fought. My boyfriend of 5 months and I broke up yesterday. He told me it was because he didnt love me anymore and he doesnt have the same feelings for me. He also didn't see his feelings progressing. He told me had been feeling this way for a week but when I saw him this last weekend everything was normal. He said that he didnt feel the same and he didnt love me anymore. He also brought up our differences all the sudden which had never been an issue before. He wasnt different at all this past weekend. He was loving, caring, wanted to always be near me and was affectionate as usual. If he was feeling this way for a week why did he still call just to talk and text to say hi. And why the night before did he tell me he could still see us being together in 3 years. When he told me this he sat on the phone with me for 2 hours while I tried to grasp what was going on even though it was really late and he should have been in bed. I just don't understand what is going on. Is it really over or did he just freak out because he is scared.
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reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2008): You mentioned that you spend every day togehter untill moving to different states.
Maybe this guy is feeling lonely where he is, needs to go out, but does not want to do it behind your back, maybe he does not have the guts to say to you that he wants his freedom!Alternatively, he might have had time away from you to take stock and could be in doubt about his feelings and the relationship.
I suggest, that no matter how difficult it might be for you now, give this guy "rope"; Don't cry and fuss, don't nag him, try and move on with your life day by day! Do not contact him unless he contacts you! He might soon discover he is missing you if not, why wait and waste your time? Start dating and find somebody that will value you and love you for who you are.
Best wishes
A
female
reader, Star_07 +, writes (5 June 2008):
 I think that the distance between you two is putting a strain on an early relationship. Since you haven't been together for very long, a strong foundation hasn't been established and the distance is causing him to question whether or not you two should be together.
That being said, he should have least been honest with you from the beginning. Maybe he really does want to be with you but doesn't see how it will work.
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