A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm confused by this guy. We met up for one date and I would describe it as only ok but we are both shy so I put it down to that and was willing to meet up another time. So we arranged a date a few days later but he cancelled last minute, I sent him a text saying that's ok, don't worry about it and then didn't hear from him for 2 weeks. Not that I texted after that either.By this point I assumed he just wasn't very interested and had pretty much forgotten about it. Then he texts again asking if I want to meet up. I'm going to text back no because I don't think it's going anywhere when neither of us seem overly keen.I'm just wondering why do you think he left it this long and am I being too harsh?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2012): Because that is how guys are. Men are hunters always looking for the next woman open to the potential of mating with him. When a guy is single he will try his luck with several women probably all in the same week, maybe not all in the same day through dates, casual encounters at bars, etc. Usually he will continue with this ritual until he gets laid and may cease altogether once he falls in love.
He knows you are not in love with him. He perceives that the chemistry was just ok. So he probably tried his luck elsewhere and just now got back to you since he didn't feel like there was that much urgency anyway, it's not like you were falling all over for each other. Frankly I think it's harmless.
He is single, you are single. Why not just test the waters one more time? If you don't hit it off this time maybe at the least you guys can remain friends.
A
female
reader, Red591  +, writes (20 December 2012):
 Just go and expect nothing. Never expect anything to come from any date until a guy says he wants to date you and you to be his girlfriend. Unless you are not interested anymore then don't go cause it would be akward
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (20 December 2012):
 I know guys can be lazy when it comes to asking a girl out for a second date. I'd give them a week at the max, that's if they're interested.
It sounds as if he's either bored, or had another date that canceled and is looking for someone to go out with.
If you weren't into him and you don't feel anything back on his end, then I would politely decline.
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A
female
reader, Ilha  +, writes (20 December 2012):
Dear OP,
My take on this is simple.. Never judge a first date as a measurement of how successful a relationship would be. Most of the times it takes a few dates to know if it would work out. Both of you are shy, therefore, it was not surprising that the first date was just OK.
Anyway, he was polite enough to inform you when he could not make it for the second date. Now, he is asking you if you want to go on a second date. Why don't you just go and have fun? No harm in that. Give a try, you might be surprised with the outcome of the second date and if not at least you know you have given a try.
He seems to be interested in you cause he did contact you after 2 weeks instead of after a month or a few months like some guys would do. He may have been bogged down with work or other commitments.
Good luck and take care!!! Keep us posted okay!!! Would help us provide better advice in the future!!!
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