A
female
age
36-40,
*atcher00
writes:I went out with / dated this guy. He used the word "relationship" to describe us at the time and said that's what he considered our affiliation to be... but afterwards he classified it as "hanging out." I heard he told someone else that we "didn't hang out for that long." .... did I miss something. I don't care that it's over or that it ended badly... it still was what it was while it was. you can't rewrite history (I wish you could!!!) When/how/why did his perception of what it was change after the fact? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (5 September 2011):
 Hi,
Why do you care what he's doing now?
What matters is that it's over, be glad and grateful that you know what he's really like and that he's no longer part of your life.
You don't need fake people in your life like him. You should actually feel sorry for him, because he's making himself look pathetic behaving this way. I feel sorry for his friends that trust and believe his lies.
Don't waste anymore of your time with this no character and find someone that truly deserves you.
Good luck
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2011): His choice of words is meant to distance himself from you and the relationship he had with you. 'Hanging out with' is far less intimate than is 'relationship'.
We cannot possibly answer the when, how and why, except to say it was obviously AFTER the relationship ended and it was because of why it ended. If things had been great you'd still be together.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2011): I can't help but notice that you too seem to have an ambiguous impression of what your relationship with him when you say you "went out with/dated" him.
Why did he change his descriptions after the fact? It sounds like he wanted to diminish the importance of his relationship with you after the fact. If it ended badly then he has all the more reason to do that. If you don't care that it's over, than I wouldn't worry about his vocabulary. I would move on and try to learn from your past experience.
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