A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I know it is embarassing but I just lost my virginity at this old age. Problem is I can't achieve orgasm during vaginal intercourse. I don't have erectile disfunction and I ejaculate easily when masturbating using my hand. Could my problem be due to too much masturbating? I didn't really use porn but have been masturbating daily ever since the age of 11. Is that too much? When I reached adulthood the frequency dropped to about 3 times a week and lately once a week. I think my sex drive is still okay because with my girlfriend we have sex every morning and night before going to sleep. My erections are strong. It is just that I can't come inside her. We have tried using condoms as well as without condoms. We have tried pulling down then foreskin as well as covering the head. No effect what so ever.My partner is always satisfied because she reaches her climax. But after that I need to pull out and either let her finish with a handjob or oral sex. Sort of an anti climax every time. Pun intended. The only advantage is that now we save money on condoms because I don't have to worry about ejaculating inside her and getting her pregnant. I read somewhere that too much masturbating can decrease penis sensitivity. Is it too late to remedy this? Should I seek professional help? Any advice? I guess everyone masturbates but not as much as me because I lost my virginity so late in life.
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condom, ejaculate, erection, foreskin, hand-job, lost my virginity, money, oral sex, orgasm, porn, sex drive, vagina Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Harmy  +, writes (21 June 2018):
Man. You gotta stop mustarbating man. It's hard but you gotta do it. I was mustarbating too but I'm rehabilitating myself. One month now without it. I'm 19 and can do it. You can do it too
A
female
reader, YouWish  +, writes (21 June 2018):
 Yes. It's because of masturbation. You've become grip-sensitive, and most likely your sexual-stimulus response has become hard-wired to need porn.
Go to yourbrainonporn.com and you'll find ways to reboot your sexual response system both physically and visually and you'll go from having a problem to ROCK HARD in no time at all.
Sometimes it happens to women who get too used to vibrators to achieve orgasm as well and find out that they can't climax to anything but the massive stimulation.
Seriously. Check out the site, and you will find all the tools you need. It's not a judgmental site, but purely physical. Tell your girlfriend that you have to get used to other ways to go, and that you need to unlearn climax from masturbation. If she's sensitive about porn, best not to talk about that part, THOUGH it's definitely part of the issue. Porn is the MALE equivalent of the female vibrator.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (20 June 2018): From what you have wrote here is what I have taken from it. Firstly with being keen to not only please your girlfriend and catch up on something that is good fun are you not putting yourself under pressure by saying you have sex morning and night and I take it each day? Your girlfriend is also finishing you off so again climaxing through intercourse will be more difficult.
I would suggest no masturbation and have sex less frequently as well and try not to think about getting finished off, because that may be a stumbling block.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2018): Try abstaining from sex and masturbation for a week or so and then have sex and see what happens... it’s probably just that you got used to your hand and are focusing on climaxing too much.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2018): I'm female. I also lost my virginity late. I'm now enjoying myself, making up for lost time! I think you got used to your hand. That's all. You have to retrain yourself. I would stop masturbating for awhile. It also doesn't hurt to talk to your doctor. Sex is very important in a relationship! Have fun! :);)
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 June 2018): You are probably using too much pressure with your hand. You should not maturbate for a week and then start with a soft grip. It might take you longer to climax but it will prepare you more for sex.
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