A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I'm a 27 year-old guy, and I'm single. My problem is that I feel really like no girls ever really feel attracted to me, and because of this I'm normally on my own and feel I'll likely see my days out alone.I don't think I'm that awful to look at. I do have my flaws but who is perfect, right? I'm a polite, friendly, non-sexist guy who is nothing but gentlemanly to women. I am interested in what a woman thinks and has to say, and certainly would not say I am solely after one thing. I think I'm funny, interesting, kind and caring enough. I work hard, care about my family and don't have any drink, drug or other bad habits. What is the problem?Personally, I suffer from pessimism and quite badly from low mood and depression (I don't show this to people if I can. I'm a kind of 'smile on the outside' type of person. I do receive medical treatment for it). But it seems I can never get girls to get past any further stage of liking me than just another guy they know, or that friend zone which everyone talks about/uses as an excuse. What is the problem? Do I not have that extra special thing? Am I unsexy, or even repulsive?Any relationships I had in the past were not much fun and have not lasted long. And I seem to attract girls who seem desperate just to not be single, which totally isn't my idea of a relationship either.My other issue is that whilst I'm not a superbly intellectual person, I am quite a deep thinker, and like people to be vaguely smart and passionate about life and their interests. Yet I seem to attract people who don't stimulate me that way and are rather dull in that respect. I don't mean that in a nasty way, but two people's minds have to meet on some level, right?Due to my bad luck with girls and love, I'd say I don't have a 'type'. I just would like to meet someone who is sweet, kind, fun, smart and if she is pretty, that's great too. Why am I getting nowhere? Is there something I'm doing wrong?Thanks Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anon_e_mouse +, writes (31 May 2011):
 Ask myself the same question sometimes.
I agree you have to be attracted to each on an intellectual level too to a certain extent. I mean... If you are quite a deep thinker I don't think a girl that talks about he hair, shoes and make-up all the time to you would be great.
I think you just haven't met the right girl yet. I'm quite a "smile on the outside" type of person too. And often used to be in the "friend zone" all the time.
Where are you meeting these girls?
I think your best bet would be to join a club? Maybe an evening class in something that interests you? You can make friends there, and their friends have friends, etc.
If you're interested in something why not give it a go? If you're meeting girls out on the town in pubs/clubs then I'm not surprised they don't last long.
Funny thing is as we get older (from early 30s) it would seem the "worm turns" and it is women who are looking for a decent man.
There is nothing to do wrong. Just be yourself and if someone likes you you'll know about it. My advice is go somewhere where you're likely to meet like minded people... for a bit of brains why not try an evening class in something that interests you just for fun?
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