A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey guys i'm in dire need of some advice. My fiance of 4 yrs and I had this great sex life about two years ago. We started intercourse about 1yr and half in and it was great. I even started it sometimes. Well my parents found out and they flipped even though they really didn't have a say in it and had no right to start talking to us about it. it was embarrassing and they even told their friends! that just made it worse. My fiance is wanting to keep going and i'm trying, but i just can't get into it. For some reason i can't get the enjoyment i used to out of it and the condom even burns me sometimes. Does anyone know why i can't get into anymore? Can anyone tell me why all of a sudden the same brand condom we have used for years has started to feel like it was burning me during intercourse? Please help me i'm so lost and want to get back on track with my fiance.
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI don't think it's an STD, we were each others firsts. It may be the latex and i have thought that before but i'm not sure. It doesn't hurt until he pulls out to switch positions or the lubrication rubs off. I can see how my parents knowing and talking about it can turn off the sex drive. I can't take the pill anymore. I used to be on it and then we lost our insurance when my step dad lost his job and had to get a new one. The pill went up to like $70 and we couldn't afford it with my moms meds and the payments they had to make. They got me back on it as soon as we could get insurance back but it would be every other month that it got refilled and eventually turned into every several months. Now when i take it i get sick to my stomach and feel horrible for a week plus bleed for a few days longer then normal. Thanks for you help so far. It makes sense.
A
female
reader, auntieloulou  +, writes (14 January 2011):
 Maybe you are allergic to the condom? maybe you have an intolerance to latex and it has started now. if its causing a rift in your sexual relationship, how about trying alternative types of contraception i.e the pill? speak to your doctor about your reaction to the condom and alternative types of contraception (dont be embarassed, they are paid to listen and deal with it and probably deal with ten times worse on a daily basis!) it may also be an STD, so speaking to your doctor is a MUST.as for not enjoying sex, in my experience i go through fazes. sometimes i really enjoy sex and sometimes i dont at all. i think you should take the actual intercourse out of the equation and enjoy other aspects i.e kissing each other, oral sex, etc. this will help you and your partner understand what pleasures you and what doesnt, and that way you can improvise them when you are actually having intercourse. if your not enjoying sex, then the moments leading up to intercourse will be tense and nervous for you, so you need to relax. make sure you stimulate yourself with plenty of foreplay beforehand, or experiment with lubrication. remember that sex is supposed to be enjoyable, so as long as you are honest with yourself and your partner with what you want, you cant go wrong!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (14 January 2011): Allergies can develop over time, so check with your doctor about a possible allergic reaction to the type of condom you guys have been using. As for your parents, well some parents are just more into their children's lives than they need to be and them discussing your sex life, you shouldn't be embarrassed. YOu're an adult perfectly capable of making your own decisions and if you want to have sex, then have sex. Perhaps knowing that your parents know about your sex life has limited your libido (sex drive). Have you guys tried new positions and things like that? Four years is quite some time and most couples usually have to work at it to keep their sex life spicy.
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