A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hello i would like opinons first from the guys have you experenced this secondly from the girls do you treat guys like this and why.I was out the other day saw some beautful women many of them so decided to talk to a few i had a beer so decded to walk instead of taking the bus.The first girl i decided to talk to was gorgeus easily the most beautiful woman ive ever seen hazel skin long flowng ebony hair egyptian eyes, just amazing.after i was able to get her attention she had her ipod on we began to talk she said i asked alot of qestions what does that mean? i asked her where she was from and what her name was i asked her where she was going,i told her i was just trying to get to kno her, she asked me why.. what kind of resonse is that.i asked her if she had a bf she said maybe i told her she either does or she doesnt theres no maybe finnaly her train came so i let her go she never answered any of my qestions.IK decided to try my luck with others the day was still young, it just got worst fromt here though, one girl i approached wouldnt even talk to me told her it was rude to just ignore me if you dont want to talk to me you can just tel me to go away she never said aword just walked away all i said was hello.i talked to a cashier i said hi how is your day she says what do you want sir, can i help you sir, please go away sir then walks away.It went on and on like that i fnnaly ran nto a woman that was actually quite nice but she was a lesbian but beautful we talked for awhile it was great to bad she was a lesbian but the thing is she was a nice person.I saw another gorgeus girl it was night now kind of late i started talkng to her after this guy walked away from her turns out that was her bf but the girl was nice we where going the same direction i explained to her that i was going this way aswell and not following her by now i was pretty drunk had atleast 8 beers but still able to hold a conversation so we talked she told me about her college plans and this and that and she seemed comfortable around me even though we where on a dark desolate street she was only 16 it turned out and she had a bf so i wasnt gonna ask her out any way.My point is if im being a nice guy why are women so mean and rude its not that hard to say you dont want to talk to someone its alot ruder and mean to just ignore someone.I dont have a problem being rejected but some of theese women where just being mean and the others just seemed scared as if they thought i would rob them or somethng there where plenty of people or cops around its not like you can just rob someone in a mall.after two days and about 60 dffrent women which nearly all ignored me or seemed to scared to talk to me, im now left confused about somethngs i always thought that if you see a girl you like dont be shy walk up and introduce your self but if the girl walks away at hello or throws her headphones in then what. soceity expects a man to get maried have a fmly and kids but honestly if women act lke this whats the incentive if i spend my mornings watching porn and my nights at a strip club i would be consider a bad guy.Now technicaly i never got rejected by any of theese women because i never asked them for any thng all i said was hello thats a pretty nice and harmless thng to say it doesnt require a cruel response.So have any guys expereinced theese cruel heartless respeonses and for females have you ever treated a guy this way if so why.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2009): Well thanks for the advice, I guess you guys have a point, BeingMyself its rude to ignore somebody that says hello to you if someones in a burning car wreck you dont owe it to them to pull them out, all im saying is if i say Hello to a woman its curtesy to say hello back. How do i sound desperate Grimm Reality? I fact many of the women i was talking to where approached by other guys i even convinced one female to talk to this guy since he drove up in a nice car and tried talking to her. Many guys where just being blatantly nasty they would say things like hey baby nice ass or worst stuff.To those who suggest i have a motive or am just trying to get sex i will say thats untrue sex is easy enough to come by just about any chick in a bar past 3:00 will sleep with you ive been approached by many women at clubs an bars and parties and then theres always hookers i kno some nice ones plus i have a few fwb .In truth I had no agenda I was just having fun I didnt expect to have any of these females in bed by diner time, but also didnt expect women to be so mean and unapproachable.I also want to add for perspective i have no problem talking to older women they seem to open up and in some instances they even started encouriging me when they over heard the women i was talking to play hard to get, one lady even told me to get to the point when i was talking to this wonderful looking girl she was friendly but. elusive.I consider some women rude and mean because i used the same approach on all the females i talked to a few where nice and receptive but most where rude ie just ignoring me in contrast if i where to talk to any random guy he wouldnt just ignore me, Human beings should be able to talk to each other but it seems we are a society of perpetual strangers.Thanks for the opinions very inciteful.
A
female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (6 September 2009):
 First off, you are not entitled to a conversation with anyone. Just because you speak to a person does not mean they have to speak to you back. It's nice if it happens, but it's certainly not required. If someone doesn't want to talk with you, deal with it and walk away.
Second, no one likes to be quizzed to death. Ask a few questions then talk about what you've heard. Giving a woman the third degree is a guaranteed turn off.
Third, you can be robbed in a mall, even with security around.
Fourth, if you think these are cruel and heartless responses, you need a reality check like BeingMyself said.
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A
male
reader, GrimmReality +, writes (5 September 2009):
 You have crossed the line from being inquisitive to being creepy.You sound a bit desperate don't ya think?Uh coming on strong like that to complete strangers is probably ok in a fantasy world or a romance novel, but not in real life.People do not like to be given the third degree when walking down the street, but when you are drunk and following people its just plain ass creepy.Those responses aren't cruel and heartless, they are responses from people you are making feel unconfortable.If you want to pursue this line of approach with women, I suggest you try it on hookers, because at the rate you are going, thats about the only sex you are ever gonna get.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009): let me give you some advice some one old and wise gave me.
Try making friends first before attempting to make it into a relationship.
If you have a hobby, use that as a topic of conversation. If you don't cultivate one, cultivate several!
martial art is good
or Music
or dancing
or what ever tickles your fancy. Makes you much more interesting and gives you more things to talk about.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009): I agree with the other agony aunts...you sound way to forward and pushy. Beautiful women get approached like this all the time ... if they took the time out to be polite and nice, they would never get through their day and once you are nice to a guy, it's usually hard to get rid of them.
Try meeting women without having an agenda...women are very intuitive creatures and probably get a 'vibe' from you that you can't even tell you are giving off.
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A
female
reader, Emaz help  +, writes (5 September 2009):
 If some random man came up to me and started speaking 2 me then i'd have my guard up stright away, you know, just incase he was gonna mug me or was just an idiot lol i would speak to them to be polite though.Most woman are not exactly 'man hating' but 99% of us have been let down badly by a man before which is why
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009): Woman are not cruel and man hating - you just scared them! If a drunk man randomly approached me in the street I would be terrified! I would run a mile from you.It is much easier to meet girls if you have similar interests i.e. you know the same people (have a common friend - ask to be introduced), you drink at the same bar (comment on the song/band playing etc), the best way however is to join a club or take a class (where you can meet a girl whos interested in the same thing as you). If youre a little shy you could try a dating site or get a few friends to go speed dating with you.If you see a girl in the street and you think 'wow'. Then its ok to ask her out. Dont do it while drunk tho! Keep your conversation short and make sure your intentions are clear.Hope you find someone.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2009): Well, from the sounds of your behaviour, all those women thought was that you were after sex. And, from the sounds of it, they were right. Put yourself in their shoes. How would you feel if some random guy came up and started talking to them, clearly only after that one thing?If you start asking lots of questions to strangers, or talking to them in a certain way, of course you are going to face problems. I am going to be honest here and tell you that you probably came across as a creep. Perhaps you don't want to be seen like that, but it's the truth. Women do not owe it to you to talk to you - especially not if you don't know them.I fail to see how pestering women who you do not know, but who fit your criteria of "beautiful," constitutes being a nice guy. I am not saying that there is anything wrong with wanting sex, or even with just wanting sex out of a relationship, but irritating random women on the street is hardly the way to go about it. Can't you meet women through new hobbies or even at bars?What you say also doesn't add up:"one girl i approached wouldnt even talk to me told her it was rude to just ignore me if you dont want to talk to me you can just tel me to go away""i told her she either does or she doesnt theres no maybe""all i said was hello thats a pretty nice and harmless thng to say it doesnt require a cruel response."..."My point is if im being a nice guy why are women so mean and rude"How exactly were they "mean and rude?"I may come across as harsh here, but, to be honest, it sounds like you need a serious reality check. Perhaps someone has given you bad advice in the past, but, regardless, you are coming across as very presumptuous.
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A
female
reader, blossomhill +, writes (5 September 2009):
No offence but from a female point of few i dont think it is fair to call these women man hating! 60 women in 2 days is a lot of women to chat to?! Do you know any of these women or are you just going up to every woman on the street, one after the other, and tryin to strike up a conversation?? Maybe you are being a bit to full on - why dont you try subtly flirting with girls you find attractive rather walking up as a complete stranger and asking question after question. Maybe they just find your approach full on and a bit intimidating. I think you should try to get to know woman in a much more natural, relaxed way rather than just randomly walking up to them and firing questions at them.
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