A
female
age
26-29,
*incerelovee
writes:Why doesnt my boyfriend orgasm when i give him a handjob, i try but he has to finish it himself, please answer i need help!
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male
reader, bharat mehta  +, writes (18 March 2010):
 The first thing about your problem is that, you are talking about 'ejaculation'. You wanted to see ejaculation as a result of your hand job. Such ejaculation is not 'orgasm'. Orgasm is a climax of sex pleasure, which has more up and down in one sex play. It is not same in both partner. It is possible, that one partner may not experience sex pleasure at all during sex play.
In your case, your boy friend need more force in hand job to arrive at 'ejaculation', and his own hand is naturally very comfortable in giving required rapidity in pumping like motion. It is only his mind, that can judge the best about amount of force required.
To enjoy 'orgasm' required entirely different dealing. It is like playing music, and in playing music you know, one need more awareness about tone and tuning and rhythm. The pattern is same when one deal with sexual pleasure...in hand job or oral job or even anything like kissing and hugging.
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (18 March 2010):
 His mind has to have 100 % concentration in the act to bring him to orgasm. If he is distracted or his mind is thinking of other things, he will not orgasm.
When he is doing it himself, he will fully concentrate on this act to bring it to orgasm.
Only he himself will know when to increase the pressure and the speed to reach the climax. If you are doing it , he will have to guide you or you will be groping in the darkness.
It takes practice to read his body signals and not every time the result is the same. On some days it will come easily because his sexual tension is high , while other days it may be harder or not come because he has a low sexual tension.
Those sexual tensions are like a coiled spring. The harder you pressed on ,the more it will spring back.
Sometimes, it just happens that even if you do everything right , he still can't orgasm.
It is not that you have the wrong techniques but the issue is sometimes with the man.
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A
male
reader, The Realist  +, writes (18 March 2010):
 It is hard to say what would work exactly. If he is able to finish it himself then you need to get him to comunicate to you while you are in the middle of it what he would like you to do. If you are able to talk about it more things will be easier and it just leads to a healthier physical side of the relationship.
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