A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:why do people date guys/girls with a past that they dont like. I hear all this stuff about RJ and all the issues it causes and yet people still stay with their partner. Why?I too suffered from RJ, but only for a few weeks because I made the decision to move on. Im ot affected by it anymore and now I'm with someone who hass a past that is acceptable. Why go through all this pain and agony for someone who isnt worth it!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2011): It is socially unacceptable to have retrograde jealousy issues in the first place. People are usually made to feel guilty for having opinions & feelings about their partner's pasts. That is much of the reason.
Another reason is that the truth sometimes comes out after months or years, at which point it's a lot harder to get out of a relationship. Children may even be involved by then. The partner with the wilder past may have been lying all along before the truth came out.
A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (11 September 2011):
 You only find out and can confirm you have retrograde jealousy after the relationship ended. So now that you prefer someone with no baggage, move on and stop looking into the past. This is your preference, accept it, no need to make it a bigger problem. If in the future you decide you don't like this part of yourself, then see if you can TRY to be more open and accepting of people with a thicker background.
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