A
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes: Why is it that some guys seem incredibly close to their sisters? Ive been dating this guy for 5months now. It feels like they flirt more then me and him. And hes always praising her more then me. I know i sound delusional but i know im not! And shes so fake around him. Its driving me crazy. Has any one ever thought anything like this before? How do i overcome it? Or should i.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 October 2010): Statistics show that about 30 percent of college students had some kind of consensual sexual experience with a sibling. So it definitely happens. Is his sister pretty attractive? If so, they might have had sex or some kind of sexual experience, like oral sex, especially if she is older than he is. What kind of things does she say to him when they flirt? Are they sexual in nature?
The only way you can find out for sure is to ask him why they are so close. Then tell him there is something you have to ask before you can pursue things further with him. Ask him if he and his sister had any kind of sexual experience, like touching, fingering, hand-jobs, oral sex, or any kind of sexual experience. If he asks why you are asking, tell him that you have never seen a brother and sister be so flirty with each other, and their behavior suggests that they either had some kind of sexual experience with each other, or that they want to. Post back here after you ask him to let everyone here know what he said.
A
male
reader, Theoir +, writes (22 October 2010):
Statistics are irrelevant to your question. You can safely assume that they didn't have sex. If you aren't comfortable with him loving his sister, then look for a boyfriend with less close/stable family ties. Family came first. You cannot expect him to ignore every woman in his family.
Much more important is how he treats you, as another poster said. If you cannot complain about a lack of affection and attention by him, there's no reason to come up with a problem with his sister.
You must take a more objective look at their relationship. Is it really that close, or are you just being jealous for no reason? Are they really "flirting", or is it just the way you see it? What do your friends think, those who know all of you?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2010): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionOk, now im wondering if theyve had sex and how common it is. Anyone good at statistics?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2010): Probably he loves his sister.
Understand it, affection is shown in many ways, and siblings can be rivals, friends, enemies, etc. This guy sounds like he likes his sister.
Nothing wrong with that.
The question is more "How does he treat you?"
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2010): I once felt the way you do, it kind of creeped me out that my boyfriend was so close to his sister. I just had a weird feeling about them, i mean, she would sit on his lap and everything and them both is their 20's. I'm close to my older brother but I do not act this way with him. But anyway, this really bothered me so I asked him about it and he told me they use to have sex together. VERY disgusting! This still bothers me from time to time but he tries to act different around her to help my feelings. If you love your boyfriend enough and he loves you, talk to him and he may do the same for you. Hope this helps.
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A
male
reader, Theoir +, writes (22 October 2010):
It's family. The relationship they have is of a wholly different nature than the relationship between you and him. You cannot compare that. The jealousy you feel is misplaced in a sense that his sister is inherently safe.
It's like the relationship between a mother and her son. Many women are jealous of their boyfriend's mother, but the fact is that they are comparing apples with oranges, so to speak. You cannot seriously expect a son or a brother to stop being ... what they are - namely a son and a brother. Family always comes first.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 October 2010): It depends on dependence. If his father is out of the picture I can see her or him falling into that role. Its always a line though.
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A
male
reader, TimmD +, writes (22 October 2010):
You can't overcome it. If you try to get in between him and his sister in any way, he will always choose his sister. Especially when they are that close. Yes, it may seem weird. Yes, it may seem unhealthy. But unfortunately, that is the type of relationship they have and most likely will always have.
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