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Why am I still holding on when he doesn't want me?

Tagged as: Breaking up<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (8 November 2009) 4 Answers - (Newest, 8 November 2009)
A female United States age 51-59, *newMe writes:

April 2009 i moved out of my ex's house and moved in with my mom. it was a very confusing breakup i didnt really understand why we were breaking up but i knew i had to leave. anyway, i still loved him very deeply and he started treating me badly like I didn't exist until he felt I was moving on then he would come back explaining how he wanted to get married but we need to work things out blah blah. this went on all summer but he wasn't serious, i knew he wasn't but i loved him. since september I have finally been getting the hint and drifting off on my own to find a new life but he keeps hangin around. we literally don't spend anytime together. my car is down and now he wants to lend me his car instead of anyone else doing so, he gives me money once per week. he sends me money through his mom and has offered $2500 to help on a new car. but he doesn't want me..i know that..I keep telling him that he doesn't have to give me money but he insists. we are not even having sex. i'm confused. I guess my question is.. why am i still holding on? or why is he, when he doesn't want me?

View related questions: money, moved in, moved out, my ex

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A reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2009):

return all of his money. dont take anything from him and take a timeout from the whole couple thing. You need to figure out who you are again and what you want.

If he wants to be with you then he can propose, end of story

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A female reader, AnewMe United States +, writes (8 November 2009):

AnewMe is verified as being by the original poster of the question

Thank you for your advise. I am trying to move on but he makes it very difficult. not accepting his help would be step #1 I guess. but I have to start someplace. thx.

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A male reader, justforfun United States +, writes (8 November 2009):

Sounds like he doesnt want to hurt u but also doesnt want u around, it doesnt have anything to do with u, its not your fault.i am sure ur a beauiful lady, move on be confident, and love ur self,

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A male reader, Danielepew Mexico +, writes (8 November 2009):

Danielepew agony auntI don't think he is holding on to you. Perhaps he feels he has a responsibility to help. He sounds like he wants to be helpful.

You're still holding on because love dies hard.

Take care.

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