A
female
age
41-50,
*ippityboo
writes:HiI've been going out with my fella for 1 and a half years now. At the start of the relationship i was so attracted to him and really wanted us to get married and get settled down. I used to worry whether he would turn round and say he didn't want to be with me anymore.then I went on holiday with my friend and got a lot of attention from other blokes. Nothing happened as i would never cheat but things changed. I questioned whether i was attracted to my boyfriend and then my mate accused him of cheating on me with her. I found out that my friend was lying though. since then i seem to go through bounds of being attracted to him and then not and feel that i don't want to kiss him. then other times i want us to get married and buy a place togheter. I'm not quite sure what is going on and why i'm acting like this. We did split up for 2 weeks because i didn't think i was bothered about him but I felt lost and my world seemed empty without him and couldn't see me being with anyone else. Can someone explain what is happening here.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, jamiejames +, writes (6 June 2007):
hey, (i ramble a lot so hopefully you can pick something usefull out of the gibberish)
im usually nicey nice when answering but from what you said you noticed a change in yourself when you started getting attention from other guys. ive seen this happen with friends of mine and friends girlfriends...nothing boosts your confidence like attention from other people, and i guess what your starting to do is think about whether you "can do better than what you have right now". if your thinking this at this point in the relationship how do you expect to feel in another year or two??
as you said when you left him you felt empty, so you will go back and stay loyal to him...but if you felt like there was someone else to move on with you probably wouldnt go back. It sounds like you have cold feet but as anyone would in your situation you find it difficult to end because you become so accustomed to your routine and having someone there for you whenever you need them.
in my opinion if you dont leave now, you will leave eventually, and probably at a time which harder for you both but where your in a position to move on more easily than at the moment.
Good luck whatever you decide to do, and good luck to your boyfriend to.
rambling's of jamiejames
Why is everyone so shallow?
Why do people give up so easily?
Men are weak, Women are calculated?
We're all fools
A
female
reader, itsME  +, writes (6 June 2007):
 well..... I think that maybe if your feeling alot of doubts about being with your bf maybe you should try to go out with someone else!!! but dont cheat... I think that if your really in love with him you wouldnt be having so MANY doubts about him! But you should try not going so fast, as in talking about marriage, and getting your own place with him..... See how it goes for about 3 months without even bringing up those subjects... he might be feeling really pressured about all of that.... hope every thing works out!
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