A
female
age
26-29,
*KnowWhatIWanTButDoThey
writes:I am fourteen years old, and many people have told me that I was one of the most mature 14 year olds they've ever met.But this is my problem:A lot of the ways and things I think, are more like a typical boy's attitude towards things. Like, for one, I think that if I want to lose my virginity to someone who isn't my boyfriend, I think that's better because I feel like boyfriends are too much to deal with and I don't want to be tied down...(But in regards to how MANY people I sleep w/, I'm like a girl..I don't sleep with just ANY1), but the boy doesn't necessarily have to be my boyfriend...and I don't feel that I should do it with some1 I love in that "in love" sort of a way, because of course the boy I plan to lose it to, VERY SOON (A few days to be precise) I love him, and have known him for years...but I want us to remain friends after this, I don't want to actually DATE him.Or really any1, until I at least graduate out of hs. I want to stay one track minded, but at the same time, I want to have fun, at least ONCE..so this is why I came up with that plan to lose it to him...And then I plan on not ever doing it again, for a while... so what is the deal? Why am I not into the whole commitment before sex things like most girls (namely, ALL of my friends)And does this make me seem "lose", even if I was losing it to my friend?? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, petina1  +, writes (30 December 2010):
 At least you are m ature enough to discuss issues to find answers. The laws are set for a reason, to try to let people make informed choices and staying within the law will keep you safer. A lot of young people who do break the law always live to regret it as they get much older as they have a mark on their character and sometimes can stop them getting ahead, for eg if they have a police check and it's noted on there. We all grow and change and what we think when we are young we look back on and think, I wish I could have done that a different way. Listen to people who are advising you, they've done a lot of this stuff and if they could turn the clock back would certainly do it a different way now. Good Luck
A
female
reader, IKnowWhatIWanTButDoThey +, writes (30 December 2010):
IKnowWhatIWanTButDoThey is verified as being by the original poster of the question Okay, I want to thank everyone who answered me...even the only male guy, who I felt was a little brutal...but that's okay, because I agreed w/ you on some stuff...and there was another question that I posted on here that kind of related into this...so basically, both of my questions were answered...
Oh yeah, and to the guy who told me that having sex at this age is illegal..since when has that EVER stopped anyone?? That's like saying marijuana is illegal, but LOTS and LOTS of people still smoke it..w/o getting sent to jail...and I have friends who lost it way back when they were like 13 and 12.. it's sad, I know but...
Anyways, thanks you guys have really helped and just to let you know, I decided not to do it anyways..I think I just need to keep myself one track like I've been doing, and have fun doing more "Friendly" things =] ..Thanks everyone!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (30 December 2010): Real mature. Yes, so mature you don't even consider the fact that you are breaking the law be engaging in ANY FORM of sex act. However minor it may be.You realise they send you to Juvenile Hall for this kind of crap?At least wait a bit longer, because you have deluded yourself into thinking that being open to casual sex makes you 'mature'.A mature person respects the act and knows why Casual sex is emotionally empty and unsatisfying compared to the same act infused with emotion and love.You are not 'loose' as the term is actually spelled. But you may need to think a little harder about all of this because you are making a very childish, and stupid argument and decision here.The fact is, this decision is not yet yours to make. The law says you can't. Deal with it.Flynn 24
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A
female
reader, Dreamer1988 +, writes (29 December 2010):
 Girls in society are not supposed to have any feelings of sexual desire, or at least if they do, not show it. This is totally wrong, and a problem with society. It's not that you are more sexual than other girls, it's that you have the guts to say it out loud. I believe in the future many boys will appreciate you :) I also think though that 14 is pretty young to be having sex period (for boys and girls). Maybe, start a hobby to get rid of or take your mind off of this sexual tension. Good luck
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A
female
reader, petina1 +, writes (29 December 2010):
Sleeping with someone for sex alone causes lots of problems. If there's no feeling there for that person then you will feel less of a person, feel used, dirty, worthless. But if you wait until you are really ready to sleep with someone who you have strong feelings for and they feel the same way about you then it is so personal, and beautiful. But unfortunately the world works in a different way today, Sex is overated and everyone has different views on it. My mother used to say 'you can have sex with anyone and she was right. Don't sell yourself short, you will just be like any other teenager getting themselves in to no end of trouble because with sex brings extremely strong emotions that some people can't handle. You are very young and I would advise you to make as many friends as you possibly can at this age and don't even think about losing y our virginity yet.
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