A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:oky here goes...Me and my boyfriend are having a very hard time... I used to get upset over his ex phoning him and finding letters from them and what ever... luckily i got over that... and then... on Saturday I we went out and I had to face not one but to of them on the same night... the first one came over to talk to us... I just gave her a dirty look and walked away leaving my man to face the music... then the second one showed up... who is prettier an skinnier an has got the im better than every one attitude... she did not come over she did not even look at me... but still I could not handle it so I flicked a cigarette at her... MY boyfriend so this and he was so mad at me for doing this... I know its a bad thing I just did not know what to do... I have no Explanation... it just was something i really wanted to do.help me to solve this problem, hos should i handle it... and not make a mess... or heres a better questionWhat is wrong with me???
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 May 2010): Hello,His ex was calling him, and writing letters while he was with you? Red flag, were those letters I want you back, or were they about them currently doing something?Its hard to really give an opinion to your post when there's little info. If he is cheating and you're aware of it, then its time to move on. If he's not unfaithful, and you're a jealous woman and over reacting then its time to work on what's making you behave this way.
A
female
reader, BunnyTee  +, writes (17 May 2010):
 First, you must realize that the ex thing is being *tolerated* (or worse invited) by your boyfriend, if he wanted the calls, letters, etc to stop then he'd have put a stop to them. It's that simple.
Flicking a cigarette at someone is churlish, undignified at best, serving only to make you look immature. Rather, politely inform your BF that you are "IT" and if you're not "IT" to him then he can have his exes back sans you. Simple: All me or nothing at all. Conduct yourself as a decently dignified, mature woman deserving of superior attention,otherwise lower your expectations of how men should treat you.
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