A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:should I be upset to learn that my friend fixed up my ex-husband just months after our divorce? the information slipped out recently and the divorce occured 10 years ago. should be water under the bridge right? why am I bugged?
View related questions:
divorce, my ex Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, SadieB  +, writes (1 July 2008):
Of course it's natural to feel upset- your friend should not have got involved with your ex husband's love life at all. I can only assume that she was a good friend to you both, and maybe he asked her if she knew anyone and it carried on from there. A divorce is very painful and it takes a long time to move on from it emotionally - even if you knew it was the right thing to do. So this was a very sesitive time for you, and naturally you are hurt to learn that your ex was looking to move on just a few months afterwards. So learning this information has now opened up the wound a little and you need to get some perspective on it before you make it into a bigger issue than it is. So, in answer to your question, it is natural that you are feeling annoyed (with both your ex for wanted to move on relatively quickly and your friend for fixing him up), but it's been over 10 years and you'll gain nothing by over analysing it - just accept that this part of your life is over and be annoyed quietly - don't say anything to your friend because it really isn't worth the hassle all these years later. Best of luck x
A
male
reader, ChiRaven +, writes (1 July 2008):
 Divorce is pretty final. You've already turned that guy back in at the service desk and gotten a refund. You can't really complain if he gets recycled to somebody else, no matter how it gets done. Assuming this woman was a friend to both of you, there's nothing disloyal about her introducing a single guy to a single woman.
Neither party in a divorce gets to have their cake and eat it too. Divorce means letting go.
...............................
|
