A
female
age
30-35,
*ngels1have1wings
writes:Okay i'm 19 and i've been with my boyfrend for over a year now, i met him at the beginning of university. I'm moving in whith him and a few friends next year but the problem is, is that i don't know if i want to be with him anymore.He does drugs and he always goes out and stays out with his drug mates till gone 7 in the morning. He's very selfish and takes advantage of my generosity. He read through my texts once and thought i cheated on him because a guy called me good looking. What's worse is that i'm starting to like this other guy who's a friend of mine and even admitted to me that he wished i was his girlfriendand he's everything my boyfriend isn't in terms of drugs etc. The major problem is, is that i cant bring myself to end it with my boyfriend and i have no idea why i'm still with him. I know i'm young and i shouldn't weigh myself down by this but i'm living with him next year and i'm scared that the second i finish with him he'll go and have sex with another girl.Or that when we live together everything will be strange and uncomfortable. Please i could do with some advise.
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female
reader, Angel Baby  +, writes (11 May 2008):
Look girl, I've been there. I know how you feel. You need to leave that guy. So what if he has sex with someone else. Its not your problem anymore. And being involved with a druggie can end up badly. I think you should definitely go with that other guy, especially if you like him and he doesn't do drugs. My ex does drugs and I'm glad we aren't together, because the girl he is with now, he abuses her. He hits her all the time and its a result of him doing coke. It makes you very mean. I don't want you to go through all that. I think you should leave him. Its definitely for the best. =D
A
female
reader, stuckinthemiddle81 +, writes (11 May 2008):
 It sounds like you really do love your boyfriend and that you would do anything for him, bu tit also sounds like you're neglecting yourself in terms of what you deserve and really need. You need someone to be there for you, someone to rely on and treat you like the beautiful person that you are. IT seems like your boyfriend really needs professional help but I'm afraid you can't help him unless he wants to be helped. Can I be honest? I think the reason why you can't leave him is because you feel like you can somehow save him from himself...that maybe if you stick around just a little bit longer he may stop drugs all together or just slow down enough to notice you being there for him. You shouldn't neglect yourself and your needs and it sounds like your male friend that wishes you were his girlfriend sees this too but doesn't want to force you to be with him and wants to see if you will make up your mind about it for good.
I say if you have a feeling that moving in with your boyfriend will cause trouble, then trust ur instinct. Don't go through with it. Start over with your friend. Who knows? You could be missing out on something better than waiting up at all hours of the night worrying when he's going to come home....good luck, sweetie.
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