A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes: I've posted before so please bear with me. My partner and I were having difficulties back in January as he kept on upping and leaving me for several days at a time. In March we had a chat and agreed we would make a real go of things and he continued to see our little boy and I thought we were getting on really well.All of a sudden, 8 days ago, he just disappeared... no explanation whatsoever and went back to live in Denmark. The odd thing is that he had given up his job suddenly and said that he had wanted to spend more time with me and the baby.Only a day or two beforehand he had told me that he really loved me and I just can't get my head around how someone I genuinely loved could just go without any explanation.On a practical point of view can I trace him for child maintenance and how am I supposed to reconcile the feelings of loss?Thank you in advance for any advice you can pass on to me. Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Ms.Advice girl +, writes (12 May 2008):
Hey,girl this what you need to do get over his sorry ass and even if he doesnt want to be you you can get childsupport from him so you can buy your baby things like diapers,enfamil milk,baby clothes,baby shoes,baby bottles,pacifers,baby toys,baby strollers,baby carseats,diaper bags,baby blankets,cribs everything a baby would need and the older they get the more they need so I would get childsupport on that guy you were with he needs to take responsibility for his child!!!!!!!!!
A
male
reader, WastedLife +, writes (10 May 2008):
This is really sad. Presuming of course, that he left the country and nothing else happened. You need to reconcile with yourself first - knowing that you are strong, and must be stronger even, that your baby has a good mother and a lost father. There's lots to speculate on, but the reality is that you need to take care of your boy and not rely on him regardless of what might happen going forward. There are lots of loving folks on this site that can help you emotionally, and many are smarter that way than I am. Feel free to PM.
The best thing is to take one day at a time, and if that is too much - one hour or minute at a time. It's a grief process of losing someone, and betrayal too. At least your boy is with you and OK. Just focus on life for the two of you right now, and deal with everything else only as you need to. If you have a spiritual path, meditation, or devout religion, that can help keep you focused, and things will get better with time. Of course, you know that, but it's little comfort right now. Our hearts and prayers are with you.
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