A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Hey guys, I'm going through a bit of a confusing season right now. There's a certain guy that I've, I guess, "had a thing with" since over a year ago, and we spent a lot of time together. I liked him and I'm quite sure he liked me also. However, nothing was official. Recently (and by recently I mean a couple of months ago), I started feeling like he's kind shutting me out, almost avoiding me. He keeps saying he can't hang out because his father (who I know is strict) won't let him. But for some reason I feel like that's not the only reason. We're just not as close as we use to be and we don't talk that much at school anymore. Instead, he spends almost all his time with other friends.I'm not too sure what this all means. Even if he stopped liking me/started seeing other girls, it shouldn't really matter since nothing was official right? Or does this really not mean anything? I just don't want to lose such a special/dear friend. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionClarification: I know for certain that he liked me, although I'm not sure if he still does. It's not that his father doesn't want him to hang out with me specifically. It's just that he says his dad won't let him out of the house to hang out with friends (he wants him to focus on schoolwork). He hasn't made "new friends" per say, since he still hangs out with the same people as always. I was always available to other guys because we didn't have anything official, but it's like I feel like I'm losing a really important friend and I don't know why.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 March 2015): If it was nothing official, you were just a couple of friends hanging-out. He spent the majority of his time with you at that point, but he must have made some new friends that he wants to spend more of his time with. You have feelings for him, but he never really saw your friendship as anything more than that. So now he feels like spending time with other friends. He's not your boyfriend; so you have to get used to seeing less of him.
He has to follow his father's wishes, if his dad doesn't think he should be dating. You were growing too close, and his father could see that. He could see it too. He may not have felt that way about you. If he did, he wouldn't be that distant.
Now you can actually make yourself available to see other boys and make some other friends. You were relying too much on just one friend, and it was beginning to look like you and he were dating. If his father wants him to spend more time with other friends, that includes around school.
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