A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hello. i've recently been caught up in this 'whirlwind of confusion' with a guy i once used to talk to. well, when we were talking, it was for a couple of months. things were going pretty well - i was happy, he was happy, and we began to like each other more and more as time progressed. in the middle of that, he cut everything off, claiming he "wasn't ready for a relationship" ...... That right there really pissed me off because he waited until we were in a steady pace to end it. I mean, why lead me on and have me thinking we have something, and then cut it off out of no where? (BTW, this happened a few months ago) So time went by, I moved on and I got over him. He went on and messed with other girls hoping he'd get something from them. I guess it didn't work out... NOW, just a few weeks ago, I received a text message from him saying "omg I miss you, you don't talk to me anymore" blah blah blah and he made it clear to me that he wanted to start things over. I'm sick of his BS, he left me feeling so confused, and I really don't know what to do. There is something in me that's telling me I still like him, but he was such an asshole..... HELP!
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female
reader, PeanutButter +, writes (29 January 2009):
 I thimk that if you're having any doubts at all then you should save yourself a lot of grief by not getting back into the swing of that relationship.
At that age, im assuming he'd a similar age to yourself, guys hormones are all over the place, they dont seem to know what they want from one day to the next and perhaps he genuinely does miss you but to what extent you can never be sure because you're not a mind reader.
There is nothing wrong with staying in touch with him though, re-aquaint yourselves as friends, make it clear to him that you dont want to be in a relationship thats full on and straight in there - he needs to earn that chance to be anything more than friends and you have all the time in the world for serious comitments and all that comes with it. If you think you have feelings for this guy, spend some time being friends - you never know, you might realise that you dont care about him like you thought you did once you spend some time. On the other hand, he might realise that he really did screw up the first time around and that there is more to the pair of you than he cared to admit.
Sit back, relax and see where things go - you're in control of your own destiny, if you want him back in your life, you do it at your own pace.
Good luck!
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