A
female
age
30-35,
*VER_BE_YOURS?
writes: My boyfriend and I been together for a year...someone from my past came back into my life on the day of our 1 year anniversary and well me and the guy been talking everyday since..when i ignore him or act like i dont care about what he has to say he always finds a way to make me feel like i need him..i asked him how he felt about me and he told me I'm just a close friend of his.But the things that we talk about and how we react to each other is more then just a close friend and maybe he's just busy with work and doesnt need a girlfriend or he just wants to use me for sex...and he also doesnt know that i have a boyfriend..and i really need some advice..do i stay with my boyfriend of 1 year and be unhappy or leave my boyfriend and be with the other guy that thinks of me as just a friend?
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female
reader, AngelofLove +, writes (29 December 2006):
I agree with female anon.
You have two issues to deal with.
1 If you really love your current boyfriend, stay with him, he gives you love and affection. But if you are finding yourself tempted by another, perhaps you do not love him really and it is time to move on. Or there is something lacking (excitement?). If you are not happy or fulfilled in this relationship, you need to end it as it is not fair on anybody. Regardless if another guy is on the scene or not.
2 This other guy wants to be friends with benefits, is that what you really want? If you decide to break your current relationship up, do not expect another to replace it, because even though this guy does not know you have a boyfriend, he has not indicated that he wants more than friends. You will not have the normal commitment of a relationship with love and affection. But you will have the excitment. How long do you think this will last? Remember new partners in courtship even if not serious are always fun and fresh which adds to excitment. Familiarity leads to this fading away and very much depends on what you want out of a relationship.
Good luck xxx
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (29 December 2006): Are you actually unhappy with your current boyfriend? If you're not then why ruin a good thing? And you say this other guy likes you as a friend, so why would you leave any guy for him if he doesn't see you as anything more?
Forget about this other guy for a second and focus on your boyfriend. If you are truly unhappy, and not just because this other guy is back on the scene, then you should get out of the relationship. There's no point being in it.
Good luck
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