A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Was with my ex for five years, don't fancy him and don't think I love him anymore. Although, he is still always on my mind. We've been apart four months. When will I be able to switch off from all this? I know in my heart that I don't feel the same. Not that he was a bad person but I know I can do much better. When will I stop feeling the pain of the break up?
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2010): Five years will take a lot longer than 4 months to get over, especially if he's not a bad person.
Seriously the only thing that will help is no contact and time. Having contact with him will literally double the difficulty of getting over him and as I said the fact that he's not a bad person makes it a little bit harder too.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2010): Sometimes having someone there all the time create a sense of beinf "safe", safe in the sense of knowing that a person is there for you, to do things with, to spend yur days and nights or just to talk about things at work. We get used to having that person and it gives us security. Whenthey are gone, you miss them, you crave for that sfe feeling again. It takes 3 months for every year that you spent with that person, to truly move on and forget. So in your case, expect at least a 1 year recovery. "Full recovery".
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2010): strangly enough am in the very same situation as your self been in a relation with my ex for 5 years (on/off) and this time we been apart for few month.i thought i dont fancy her nether love her any more as well but she is always on my mind wish explains one thing and 1 thing only i do still love her and you do love ur ex! in my case cant do any thing because my ex start dating already, think now i can do beter, not to wast my time for someone moved on in 2 or 3 month after 5 years in serious relation!! they say time will heal all wonds so we wait
i thought to share my experiance with you i have to b honest i feel exactly the same company and friends help and make sure u dont let that mind wonder and u'll feel beter
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2010): Well, there is no way to say what will make yourself feel better , I mean specifically YOU , but i will impart this wisdom to you . Time heals all wounds , and I'm sure you are not thinking about him when you are having a laugh or two with your friends . So try and surround yourself with people that make you comfortable , and stay strong.
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