A
male
age
30-35,
*lone11
writes:hi... well i am very jovial guy and right now finished my deg 2nd year. in this academic year i fell in love with my junior she is very good and very talkative, and shy girl. she was friendly to me, i saw her first on July 16 2010 and i changed all my behavior to impress her i started studying,well dressed up, respected every girl. the fact is that i stood first in my class. earlier she asked my phone no. but i did not give her this was my foolishness and i was afraid that i may get mad towards her. finally i took initiative and took her no. and we were in touch with each other through chatting. she know that im in love with a girl but she doesnt know that was herself and she used to ask me who is your girl? when will you show me? i gave her many hints but she couldnt find out. one fine day (26th November) i was bit disturbed because she was not messaging me but she messaged my friend because we had a small fight yesterday evening but later in the evening she messaged me. i said that im not in a mood but she again asked me after an hour that can she chat with me. i was angry and cant wait any more so i proposed her by texting to her phone when she messaged me. she said to me that she wants to be a friend and she dont have feeling for me later she stopped speaking to me for 3 days but atlast the only reason she spoke to me because i ask her once that will she speak to me if i propose her she said yes i do speak to you. and she spoke to me till new year. on 31st December she called me and spoke to me i felt very happy and i didnt know that was the last day she is speaking to me. after that on 2 January 2011 i went to her class and asked why is she ignoring me? she said that this is her new year resolution she dont want to speak to me and i was gone mad over there i tried my best to speak to her but she refused me. i asked her why did you speak to me all these day? she said her friends said to speak that is the only reason she spoke to me. so i finally lost all my hope but still had a strong feeling that she will be mine. i just left to god and tried every possible way to forget her and one month passed i was bit comfortable and i never looked at her. and on feb 5th 2011 she came towards me and said sorry for her behavior and she wants to speak to me so i said that i dont want to get hurt any more and said u'll speak to me for few days and again leave me but she said that she will never do that again.i even said that still i love her a lot and i dont need her friendship and atlast we had a good time with each other when ever she calls me i say the three magical words she just smiles. i asked her many time is she ready to be with me she says no. now my question is:1)i am afraid that she may leave me.2)i am afraid that she may stop speaking to me.3)is she in love with me.4)what is running in her brains. please help me what should i do ?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, loveonce +, writes (26 April 2011):
 look friend,you are in love with her...you could have been more manipulative to her regarding your feelings..the day you fought..you both were in tension..but your tension was triple:1.you both fought 2.you had feelings of love (possession)3 & she msged your friend(wasn't that a male)
getting triggered by mixed feelings & insecurity you untimely,expressed ur feelings..look the day before u fought,today u were angry...and now u r proposing her..do'nt u think the girl responded negatively and more negatively coz she wanted to teach u a lesson(she is not into you,remember),taking this as an opportunity..
well that's over..now the bigger disaster lay over u as ,she now has a full control,over you,your condition.Your being happy,non happy rests upon her acceptance of love etc..all these things are giving her immense satisfaction,u know..seeing u miserable has now become her unconscious happiness..though she pretend to be nice,friendly..believe me..she won't give you a shit...it is all running in her brain..whether u accept or not..
what should you do:
show some manness and stop sayin i l u again n again,as it
shows you more miserable and needy to her.
and remember never fall for anyone until they are ready to catch you..be a man ..and show her that you can exist to you fullest without taking a shit from her..
world respects those who respect themselves!!
A
male
reader, alone11 +, writes (26 April 2011):
alone11 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanks for the answer u have given me i loved her and i love her till the last breath of my life and i am sure i will help her if she is in relation with other guy. well it hurts but i should accept the truth.
thank you once again keep in touch bye
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (26 April 2011):
 1) I understand that you are scared that this girl might leave you. But to her you are only her friend. To you she is much more and in the long run you will end up getting hurt because I dont think that friendship is enough for you.
2) I think somewhere down the line that she may actually stop speaking to you because I think things might get messy between the both of you. I think she would like to have you as a friend but that all.
3) No she is not in love with you and you need to accept this. You may love her but she does not love you and it is highly unlikely that she will ever love you and I think you need to accept that you will never be with her and move on.
4) I think she stopped talking to you at new year because she realised that it would keep hurting you to keep talking to you. She now knows that you want a relationship with her but she doesnt want that with you she only sees you as a friend and that is why she tried to cut you out of her life because she doesnt want to keep hurting you. The only way this is going to work is if you put your feelings to one side and just accept that you are both platonic friends. Stop telling her you love her and just be a friend to her. But also ask yourself can you handle just being a friend because the day will come when she falls in love with another guy and you will need to accept this as she doesnt want to be with you. I think you need to start looking for another woman.
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