| A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: Hi. When is the right time to introduce my boyfriend to my parents? I have never brought a guy to meet my parents but with the one I am dating now, I feel the need to do so. We have been together for six months but knew eachother more than three years before dating. My parents are old so they prefer traditional ways of doing things, he has already told his parents about me I think it is only fair if i do the same. He is 22 im 20, Im confident about the future with him and we already spoke about it, he was kind of smiling about it. Also what is the best way to introduce him so that it is not awkward in a way that it will reduce the chances of him being disliked? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2016): thank you all for your time. N91, I have not met his parents yet but they know about me because he told them. Once or twice his mother insisted to talk to me on the phone and the last time we spoke I got invited to his mother's younger sister's wedding which will be taking place next month.
@ Slippers no I never speak about guys to my parents maybe I should start doing so. Growing up my parents never allowed me and my two brothers (they are 16 and 22) to talk freely about dating. @BrownWolf he is indeed kind, loving and respectful. Im not worried about his character that might make him disliked. I am worried about my parents' character (especially my mom) of being over protective and exaggerating situations even not necessary. She is special in my life but I hardly ask her for advice because she gets angry easily so her advice is always forced out to me and everyone else. @ CindyCares my parents don't like going out. My mother being the boss she is controlling and would worry if we go out because "we are wasting money" . He is handsome, smart, has won several awards from his previous school as the best learner in the whole area apart from his school. He is very patient, respectful and disciplined. His mother is so proud of him, he is now working towards being a researcher in a field of biochemistry. So no I'm not worried about him, he is more than my boyfriend this guy is my mentor and my guardian even before we started dating he has always been my support when no one did. He is always washed, clean and shaved and smelling nice, we are hygienic people, im not worried about that. My mother being the difficult person she might make up a story to make us feel bad for loving eachother but my wish is for her to like him. I am worried about my mother's opinion, she is a hard person to please.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (8 November 2016):
 I think you are overthinking this a bit. Keep it simple.
Say " Mom, this meatloaf / lasagna/ cake / whatever is delicious ! what do you say if one of these evenings I bring Jim over so he can taste some ? ". Variation for modern, in career / non cooking moms :" Why don't I bring Jim over one of this nights and we can all order pizza / Chinese / sushi ? "
Act the same as if you were having over any other close friend and let things develop and warm up naturally. That should be traditional enough for most parents and at the same time low key and not a huge-big-superformal-deal .
As fot him being disliked - why do you assume they should dislike him ? Is he so scary looking ? Whos is he ? A Hell's Angel ?....
Eventually, your parents will like him or not like him once they know him better , based on the person he is , the quality and flaws he has, and,most of all, the way he treats you.
For the time being, tell him to show up showered and shaved, have him bring a bottle of wine or a bunch of flowers, make sure ( or hope ! at least ) that he does not burp in their face , says the F-word every other word, gets drunk and belligerant, ... have him act normal, -polite but not fawning -like any other dinner guest would , and he should pass muster easily.
...............................
A
female
reader, Slippers  +, writes (8 November 2016):
Do you speak about him to your mum and dad .. my parents were older and old fashioned so I know where your coming from .. start talking about him more .. If your seeing him and where and how the night went .. tell them any funny that may happen . LET them know you think he's special.
Just asking him to call by for you before heading out .. say mum and dad it's ... ask him in.. say this is my mum and this is dad etc and make it light and quick that's the first intro dome .. you then say oo mum I was thinking ..? Could come over for a cuppa etc . see how that goes
...............................
A
male
reader, BrownWolf  +, writes (8 November 2016):
If your boyfriend is kind, loving, and respectful of his own parents, then you will have no issues bringing him home.
If he is not kind, loving, and respectful of his own parents, he will eventually do the same to you, and your parents.
By the way...that is how you choose a good guy. The way he treats his mom, is exactly the way he will treat you.
...............................
A
female
reader, Slippers +, writes (8 November 2016):
Do you speak about him to your mum and dad .. my parents were older and old fashioned so I know where your coming from .. start talking about him more .. If your seeing him and where and how the night went .. tell them any funny that may happen . LET them know you think he's special.
...............................
A
male
reader, N91 +, writes (8 November 2016):
 Does he come over to your house often? I think next time he does maybe you could just take him into the living room with your parents and just introduce each other and I'm sure your parents will probably have a few questions from him to find a little about him. That way it will probably be a brief meeting, maybe 10 mins or so and then could build a relationship from chatting when they see him in future after that.
You could also go out to lunch with them possibly? That would be a good opportunity to have a good chat. However, you may feel like it could be a long time for them to chat for the first time.
Just do whatever your boyfriend and you feel comfortable with. How did he introduce you to his parents?
...............................
|
