A
male
age
30-35,
*ammer69
writes:My girlfriend doesn't want kids and I'm not ready for them. We have just started to have sex. I do wear a condom but I want to make damn sure that I do not get her pregnant. but we don't have the money for birth control not to mention if her family found out they would kick her out. I know about ovulation and the menstrual cycle but there is one answer that eludes me. When is the best time to have sex? And by that I mean when can we have sex and be almost certain of her not getting pregnant.
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female
reader, k_c100  +, writes (22 July 2011):
 There is no time of the month where you can be certain a woman wont get pregnant. Even during a woman's period she can still get pregnant, so there is no magical time when you can be having sex with no risks. Technically the most likely time for a woman to get pregnant is in the middle of her cycle (work out when she gets her period, then its around 2 weeks after that) because this is when the egg has descended far enough for the sperm to reach it easily, yet the egg is still fresh enough to be fertilised. So the beginning and the end of the cycle (i.e. the end is her period, and the start is the few days after the period) are supposedly when she is least fertile because there either is no egg (at the end when the period 'flushes' it out so to speak) or the egg has only just been released and the sperm cannot go that far up the fallopian tube.
However this is not enough to be certain she wont get pregnant - eggs can be released early so it could be much lower down that normal, eggs may not be removed in the period so it is still around, an egg may stay fresher for longer meaning it can still be fertilised outside the usual fertile period....there are so many different variables it is never safe to say 'oh at this time of the month she CANT get pregnant' - there is always a chance of getting pregnant, regardless of when you have sex.
If you are using a condom and are careful putting it on and taking it off then you should be ok - yes it is not ideal without birth control but the condom is pretty effective.
I'm sure her parents would be more likely to kick her out if she got pregnant rather than if she was honest with them and asked for birth control - can she not talk to them? They would prefer their daughter is protected rather than pregnant, so they might not react in the way you think. Give it a try - if they go mad well at least you have tried and you have your answer.
I hope this helps and good luck!
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 July 2011): This is not possible.
You cannot predict ovulation that precisely, and sperm can survive in the female body for up to 7 days (THAT'S RIGHT FOLKS, SEVEN DAYS).
She may not be ovulating today, and you have a nice condom free quickie and go back to having nice safe sex after that, but 6 days later she ovulates and damn you make a nice looking father.
So, in answer to your question...
"And by that I mean when can we have sex and be almost certain of her not getting pregnant."
The best time for that is when you are in the shower alone and have a nicely lubricated hand as your partner! That's pretty certain not to get her pregnant.
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A
female
reader, lovedoctress  +, writes (22 July 2011):
 Using a condom every time you have sex will definitely protect her from becoming pregnant. Unless the condom break which is unusual. Once used correctly it doesn't break
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