Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 October 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you anonymous!
and again, thank you all.
Take care
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (13 September 2008): Everything else is going for you - GO FOR IT AND GOOD LUCK!
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A
female
reader, SugarCookie  +, writes (12 September 2008):
You are very welcome!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionDaletom and Sugarcookie,
thank you so very much. I feel as if it will be fine as well, but thought I would get someone else's point of view.
You both make great points and a few that I didn't even think of.
Last night the hubby and I decided I should go ahead and see the doctor first thing next week. I'm excited!!!
Again, thank you so very much!
Have a beautiful weekend!!
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female
reader, SugarCookie +, writes (12 September 2008):
There is nothing wrong with wanting a baby at your age. You couldn't be more financially or emotionally stable at this point in your life. There is a chance at having difficulty getting pregnant and a chance of a complicated pregnancy and a premature birth but really when is that not a possibility.
The only thing that you and your husband have to decide is if your child is born with birth defects are you two ok and ready to handle that. I'm sure you two are so that isn't even really anything to worry about.
First off i'm sorry for your lose but keep trying and that beautiful baby will come.
Just make sure that you get a physical to make sure that everything is ok with your equipment and with your heart and blood pressure. Then go for it.
Good luck!
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male
reader, daletom +, writes (12 September 2008):
Please take my condolences on the loss of your baby.
My wife and I lost our first child to birth complications. It was a very sad and challenging time for our marriage, but actually increased my desire for kids. Now, the event is part of the shared history that defines us as a couple and holds us together.
I wish you success in your attempts to have a child.
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male
reader, daletom +, writes (12 September 2008):
I don't think 40 is at all "too old". My (baby boomer) generation deferred having children and many of us were over 40 when we completed our families. In my circle of acquaintances are two couples who experienced fertility problems and adopted infants when they were in their late 40's or early 50's. (My wife & I were almost 38 when our youngest was born. She spent an entire summer explaining to me how gray-haired ladies got pregnant. As I recall, it has something to do with gray-haired men.)
I presume you are in good health and have maintained a generally healthy lifestyle through your life. You can do the research and find the reliable health-related statistics related to a number of issues:
- You may find it more difficult to conceive.
- There is an increased potential for some birth defects.
- You are more susceptible to certain complications.
But the absolute likelihood of ANY of these problems still remains small - the "increased likelihood" for most of these problems is often like an increase from 0.5% to 1%. And your medical professionals will help you manage any situation that arises.
You may also discover that children born to older parents have advantages. They tend to be better-adjusted overall, and develop a broader range of interests and abilities than kids born to younger parents. While older parents may be challenged to find the energy and attention demanded of very young children, they make up for it with wisdom and life-experience. Older parents are often in a better position to provide financial support for a child.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 September 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI have 3 children from a previous 12 yr marriage, but my husband and I want a child together and we lost one in October of last year. I've had a couple of people tell me that they think I'm to old to even be thinking about a baby.
My husband doesn't have any children and he wants one of his own so badly. He is absolutely wonderful with his step children (my children) and they want him to adopt them. 8o)
Thank you very much for your advice and that's an idea my husband an I have been discussing so a doctors visit is in the near future.
again... thank you
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A
female
reader, GuardianAngel  +, writes (12 September 2008):
 Hello The fact you want a baby at 40 isn't crazy but I would say stop trying for children at 45 because the older you get without having a baby the more complications you get because as you get older things stop working properly but if you want my advice I would go and talk to your doctor about your plans and see whether its ok too have a baby at that age.
Best Of Luck With The Doctor And The Baby
Guardian Angel
p.s Need anything else just write to me Best Wishes xxx
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