A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I'm so scared of losing my girlfriend, but i can't stop hurting her! It's like i've got the bad guy on one shoulder, and the good guy on the other!We've been for almost 2 years now and both at college, and going to the same uni in october.Whenever i'm out with my mates, i can't help but get drunk, and then i'll do stupid things, like telling her i hate her, and that i think she's a waste of space. Or even worse cheat on her. She's taken me back after cheating on her 4 times, and even though i love her and really want to be with her, i know she deserves better then a loser like me.The worse thing ever happened last night though, we had a row because she's choosen not to go to uni this year, and take a gap year. To figure out what she wants from life, ECT. I went out and got drunk, like most nights, and when it was time for us to leave the club, i walked around to her house. Her parents told me to leave, but i refused, instead i shouted and told the whole street about the abortion she had last christmas. Now she won't talk to me, look at me, answer my calls. Anything. She says that i turn into someone else when i drink, but i can handle it normally. I'm such an idoit, and i don't deserve her breath, but i love her. How can i sort myself and this all out?Thanks in advance if any one can help.
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female
reader, Jesshton  +, writes (21 May 2009):
 I was married to someone who did this to me for 10 years. Notice I said WAS MARRIED. While my ex claimed to love and adore me...when he drank...it got ugly. I literally dropped him off on the doorstep of a rehab facility once. It worked for a short time, but then he went back to drinking. We had many conversations and arguements about his drinking, and one think was certian for him and will be certain for you. If you continue...you WILL drive everyone around you away. Your girlfriend, your friends, your family. You will wind up alone, as did my ex. Please get help now while you can and have people that will love and support you! Do it for you and do it before you have no one left.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2009): I think the damage is already done, if you love her let her go because she doesn't deserve this. You're very lucky she has forgiven you in the past but I think you should move on and sort yourself out. DO NOT DRINK. If you can do that and learn from this then it will prevent it happening in future relationships.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (21 May 2009):
 STOP DRINKING!
It is that simple, are you honestly that weak that you can't control the amount of alcohol you drink? She deserves better than you and I'm more disappointed that she hasn't dumped you already!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2009): fool.
Change - then show her how you have changed. consider if she says no - recompense for being a fool and a just punishment....then do her the dignity of walking away.
unless you can do that no chance....
star.x.
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A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (21 May 2009):
 You have a serious drinking problem, Buddy. You may even need some time in rehab. First you sort out this drinking problem then you can deal with your love life. It is only down hill from here if you don't.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (21 May 2009):
The first think you need to do is grow some balls and stop drinking. You will never drink again.
You tell your friends this and you stick to it.
No girl should ever EVER have to put up with what you did to that girl.
You say you love her but you have obviously destroyed her self esteem for her to have forgiven you all this. A normal woman would have dumped you at the first sign.
If you care about this girl then you will get out of her life so she can start again and rebuild her shattered self esteem.
Stop drinking and sort your life out.
Then send her a letter in a few weeks and apologise and explain and give her closure and say goodbye.
Good Luck!! xx
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