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female
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*ostsoul
writes: When do you know the person you are seeing is the one for you ?Does it suddenly creep up on you or do you know straight away ?Sorry for the silly question, but I thought I really knew someone and now im not so sure, and I thought they were the one and now its seems to be going wrong.Been together 6 months and was love at first sight, and I do care alot, but it doesnt feel like it did, does this happen all the time and does everyone exprience this ? Thanks Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2006): I think falling in love can be an amazingly intense experience, but if you have not had other relationships to compare it to then you can not really know they are "the one"
Falling in love the first few times you probably think they are the one, when in fact you are just experiencing those initial feelings that you would get with anyone that you feel you are falling in love with.
I think knowing if someone is "the one" comes from other things other than that great feeling. It includes things like knowing, from experience, their qualities, nature, personality and history are all compatible with your own self; a person who can bring to a relationship qualities that provide the potential for it to last a life time.
It is very, very common for relationships to only last around 7 months if they were based on an "instant" attraction, or if sex started immediately in the relationship. For something to last much longer, you need compatibility of all the qualities I mentioned above, and not to go just on the love at first sight feeling.
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