A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:When a guy is being possessive in a relationship, is it healthy? Especially when it lasted very long (4 - 5 years). Where there has been breaks ups but then patching back many times. Hurting the girl emotionally with harshful words and slapping a girl in the past. And then being happy with the guy for some weeks or a month or 2, and then a conflict arises and start quarrelling with each other and it becomes repitititive and the cycle goes on and on in that relationship. And that girl has went through so much of emotional hurt with that relationship. Currently that girl is in good terms with that guy. So in such situation where that girl is in good terms with him, does this mean the guy has totally changed? No more possessiveness? permanent happiness? Or it'll get worst in the long run? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, followtheblackrabbit  +, writes (3 October 2010):
 Cycles are extremely hard to end. If a guy is possesive and abusive then he has issues that stem from insecurities and maybe a personal cycle where he witnessed abuse as a child and imitates it now. Unless he's getting or had therapy and time to reflect and be better, I doubt he completely changed. After all, he has had periods in the past where he's perfectly fine and happy and treats his girl well-only to become horrible again.
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