A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone.I have a simple question:Why would a guy go out of his way to tell me he spent the night alone on a Friday night. He fell asleep on the couch.Is it possible he has a reason for telling me this? Because he volunteered it to me. I never asked him what he did.I thought most guys would not want to admit to a female friend that they were alone on a Friday night. And he has a girlfriend that he never, ever talks about by the way.Whenever he says he is doing anything, he says I am doing this or that, never we are doing this. His girlfriend is never mentioned. It is as if she does not even exist. And the relationship is fairly new so she shouldn't be such a well kept secret, should she?Why is he so friendly and flirty with me and pretending like he is single? He makes sexual innuendo with me. He is always finding a way to touch me. He always asks me personal questions about my children and my life, gives me advice on personal situations I am going through. He asks me how I get along with my ex, gets jealous if I mention others guys who like me. If I go out to dinner, he asks me where I went, what I ate. He doesn't only ask how my weekend was, but he wants to know exactly what I did.If he sees I am mad at him, he tries to act extra nice and flirty.What's up with that? What is his problem? I just don't get these mind games he is playing.. Can you guys help me figure him out?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (16 July 2012):
 This is pretty easy. He wants to bag you and in order for that to happen he has to pretend like he is interested in your life. The better question is why are you entertaining his attention and going along with it? Don't be that fool that gets played in the end.
And clearly you and other people know that he has a girlfriend. If he never mentioned her, or if he was never seen with her, no one would know he was involved with a woman. Clearly he must have told someone he has a gf or it is an obvious visual thing, so it's not like he is hiding it from the world.
A
female
reader, Basschick  +, writes (16 July 2012):
 He is the worst kind of guy. He's in a relationship yet he's secretly keeping his options open. And I'd be willing to bet his girlfriend has no clue. She thinks he comes home to her every night, listens sympathetically to how his day went, how much stress he's under, oh poor baby, gives him a back rub, cooks him dinner, has sex with him....if she only knew! You have a snapshot of this guy. Think long and hard about getting involved because like it or not, you could very well be the girlfriend who kisses him good-bye in the morning, goes happily about your day thinking he's a great catch, while he is schmoozing some cute girl at his office, saying "I went camping this week-end...I went to a fabulous rock concert....I....I....I but all the while, it's really "We". Steer clear. He's dishonest and he's a player.
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A
female
reader, IamJess  +, writes (15 July 2012):
 It seems like he's not really interested in the girl he's dating otherwise he would want to show her off to everyone and make them aware she is his. He's more interested in getting your attention and making it quite clear he has a thing for you, I don't know whether he's doing this because they like a challenge and something different, and if you believe he's single he gets to act single, and do everything a single guy does whilst still obviously having the relationship on the side aswell. He wants the best of both worlds I think, and aslong as your not going to get attached to him, or start liking him I'm sure it won't affect anything, because he'd just do the same to you, unless he was REALLY into you.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (15 July 2012): I don't see any mind games. He wants to hook up with you behind his GF's back. He isn't verbally spelling out his exact intentions but he is making it clear enough.
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