A
female
age
41-50,
*3 Angel
writes:Hey there. I'm so confused as to what has happened in the past six months. I'm very inexperienced with guys (yes, even at my age!) but have had three occassions lately where I've received "booty" calls from diffent guys! What the heck!?I know the laws of attraction is very strong and believe strongly in what you put out there will come back to you, but have never asked for, or acted asif I want to, this to happen!Today was the last straw! I met a guy at my place of work about a year ago. He started a conversation saying he's seen me in another town (where my dad lives) and we've been saying hello in passing to each other ever since. Nothing major, just hello how are you. Some days he would greet me and others not. Today of all days he suddenly stops me and asks what I've been up to. Then asked if I have a boyfriend and on my reply I don't, said we must do something sometime. I said that would be nice. He then mentioned to go have coffee and we got into my car (he had his motorbike at work) and off we go, BUT as I live nearby thought it would be ok to go to my place - for coffee of course. But once inside the apartment, he started kissing me - hello!! I said we don't even know each other and why suddenly now?! He asked why not? He's just trying to get to know me.My question is, how do guys operate? What signals do they look at thinking "this woman must be easy, let's try it"!?I honestly don't sleep around and definately don't put that type of signal out there! I am a friendly person and often crack jokes, but never have "put it out there" that I'm easy!Guys, your advice would be great as I DON'T want this stuff to continue.He said we should meet up again tomorrow, same place same time, but I think it best not to persue this issue. Should I see him tomorrow in passing, I will rather tell him to forget about it! I'm not into lunch time flings!
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female
reader, A3 Angel +, writes (18 August 2009):
A3 Angel is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys, your replies have been such a help. It's put a lot of perspective on this issue.
I always tend to think things are innocent when they're not. It's time I realised this!
I was quite prepared today to face him and tell him I'm not into lunch time booty calls, and guess what - he wasn't at work today! Such a coward!
Anyway guys, thanks again!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2009): It might not be the impression your giving to him, but rather the impression he would prefer to recieve from you!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 August 2009): If you don't want to talk to this guy anymore, then i think you should make your feelings clear to him and don't meet up. If he got the wrong impression once just because you were being friendly with him, he's bound to get the wrong impression again!
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A
male
reader, passionatelynumb  +, writes (17 August 2009):
 Most guys will do or say whatever it takes to get in your pants. Usually those kind of men will break contact with you once they get sex, or until they have their fill of sex with you. You'll probably find that once they realize that you aren't "easy", that they'll move on. Almost every guy loves sex, but the ones who are interested in a real relationship with you will be willing to wait until you are ready. The man who doesn't bolt after you tell him you want commitment before sex, is one you should definitely consider as a potential life mate. They are out there. And beleive me, they will appreciate knowing that you didn't let yourself get used for booty calls. You have no idea how much respect your future partner or husband will have for you knowing that you didn't just give it away.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (17 August 2009): In your 30's and still don't understand the male mind? All men take any kind of attention from a woman they know casually or at work as flirting. My girlfriend has a thing about lint on clothes. She is a lint picker. One day at work she picked the lint off of a co-worker's sport coat and before she knew it, he was trying to get her back to his place for coffee. From my girlfriend's perspective, the lint was annoying to look at, but to her male co-worker, he thought she liked him enough to be concerned about his appearance. He took that as her flirting with him.We are at a bar after work and my girlfriend tells me this story and I am with a male friend. She says she was quite surprised at the reaction from her male co-worker, but my buddy and I just looked at her and said "Are you kidding?? Of course any guy would take that as flirting".BTW - coffee back at his place or your place means "sex".
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