A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am currently in a relationship. I have been in this relationship for a year in December. I moved out with this guy in March - as we clicked so well, and it felt as though it could work. While we have been living with each other we have had lots of problems. in june things got real bad, and I went back home to my parents for a week, and it made him realise that things needed to be changed between us as the way we were dealin with things wernt working out. Its now november, and problems consistently arise. For example, arguments about whats for dinner, about my working hours, about how I am close to my parents and talk to them about 4 times a week, and just anything. I feel as though I am becoming depressed. as I find it hard to wake up in the morning, and when I do i am always all sluggish and i go and visit my mother or a friend, (such as today) and it cheers myself up. I come home writing him a sms saying lets just have a nice night together. Thursday nights is the night we go food shopping, and as soon as he got home he kept mucking around wasting time, so by the time we got out of the house the butcher was shut and we couldnt do anything. This frustrated me because it meant that my day off tomorrow will consist of me food shopping, and I never get anything right and he gets angry at me. I don't know where I am going with this, but i feel as though I don't matter any more, like he doesn't hold my hand, and hug me, he hugs me for 5 mins before we go to sleep and thats about it. sex is really bad, it just feels as though nothing is working out any more. If I bring up the topic of that I want out, I know he will pull all this crap and say that i give up too easily etc. but I know that we arent getting any where. we havent improved over the past 6 months, and I am feeling even more depressed. What's the easiest way to get out of this without having to deal with his crap?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks so much for the help guys!
A
female
reader, petina1  +, writes (27 November 2008):
 I'ts early in the relationship and you sound like you are still trying to get to know each other. That can be hard at first when you move in together. It may help if you can afford to go out together for a bit of fun or leisure rather than leave him at home while you visit your mum sometimes. Try to find time to talk about your feelings rather than run to your parents every problem arises. hope this helps..
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2008): I can remember something similar when I was about your age but it being the other way round. My boyfriend and I had lived together for a year but we weren't getting along at all. One day i came home from work and found he had emptied the house and gone back to his parents. There was absolutely no warning and I had had no idea he had even taken the day off work. I mention this because it really hurt and I thought we had been burglared until I realised it was only his stuff that was gone.If you have made your mind up and it appears that you have please tell him that it is not working out and why and then have a few essentials packed in a bag and get one of your parents to collect you. That will stop him from guilt tripping you and begging you to stay as he won't feel so comfortable doing that infront of a parent. Be fair and firm and tell him you are going. You may also feel that after a few days break that you feel differently and do want to be with him after all.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionBut if i do that, wont he go all like oh u didnt try and work on us, u gave up on us so quickly. or u think that packing is the easiest option?
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 November 2008): You have already decided that you need to get out. Now just do it. It will not be so difficult if you plan it carefully. Move most of your things whilst you have your day off and when he gets home talk to him and tell him that it is over or leave him a letter explaining evertyhing in detail.
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female
reader, MT19 +, writes (27 November 2008):
I would go one step further than the above answer i would actually get my stuff out during the day while he is at work then wait for him to come home, lay in on the line to him, then pick up my keys and walk out the door. Once you make the decision in your mind that you want to go just do it I guarentee you will feel completely liberated!!!
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