A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:A few months ago, I met a girl at my step-dad's church function and we hit it off really well and decided to go to dinner at another time. Her phone was shut off, so she just told me where she lived and said that she was sorry she couldn't let me in because the building only allows women. I pointed out how stupid that sounded but she told me half of it was a batterd women's shelter. I didn't really buy that, but I let it slide and we agreed to meet at her work after she got off. Since she rides the bus, after hanging out, she was going to take the bus home, but I kept her later than we meant to and she ended up spending the night.Now, right as I picked her up, she slid over close to me and basically cuddled me and sine I drive a stick, that's really awakward. I kept pointing that out but I didn't want to sound like an asshole. I just also kind of liked that she was running her hand through my hair because it was turning me on but it was also annoying because I was trying to drive and I didn't want to be all turned on at dinnerWe only went to a fastfood place because that was all she could afford and she didn't let me pay. She also kept making all this sexual talk even though I tried to change the subject. When we got to my apartment, we ended up making out right away and we were getting toward rubbing each other through our clothes but then she stopped me and said she "wasn't that easy". So I left her alone and we cuddled and we ended up cuddling on the couch but I moved her to my bed because the couch isn't comfortable for her and I didn't want to share a bed if a) we're not having sex and b) if she's "not that easy". Besides, I was super-horny and needed the time to myself For awhile there, she wouldn't try to talk to me or contact me (I ran into her nearly every day t her work) and then out of the blue, she friended me on facebook and put her number on my wall. Now, she's liking comments I made and pictures I posted from months ago and she's making all these comments on thing smy friends and family posted. In other words, she's being WAY too familiar and people are asking who she is. Apparently, step-dad had never seen her before either and some women from the church says they THINK she was from a shelter and that some of the women show up there for free food and things. Even if they weren't invited, no one turns them away.That doesn't really jibe because she does have a job and she paid her own way. I defriended her a fewtimes, thinking whatever we had was over, but she would re-friend me again - nearly every day. So I gave up and basically just ignored her and stopped responding. Well, now she has my phone number (thank you, facebook) and she keeps texting asking if we were going to pick up where we left off again because she really, really missed me. Apparently, she got a different job, because they said "that crazy girl? She's no longer with us" that should have tipped me off.We met up again, this time at another fast-food place, and she was in the bench next to me, rubbing on my leg and getting darn.close to rubbing something else. I was "trapped" against the window so I couldn't just get up and move. I finally went to the bathroom, all freaked out about someone seeing my boner and then I moved ac ross from her. She moved to sit next to me, again. If we were not in public, this would have been fine. I got her back to my apartment again and we started making out again, she turned me down for going further (again) but when I went to bed (couch) alone, she came back, invited me into my bed, and ended up using her hand. Now she's back to ignoring me again unless she randomly posts on my wall, friend's walls, and family's walls. thankfully she hasn't said anythign sexual, but she has public pictures of her up dressed skimpy, being tens of pounds thinner and looking halfway dead, pictures of her with some rough-looking people, and pictures of random street corners wtih no explanation.Friends, family members, and church members are asking questions. Questions I don't know the answers to and don't want to know the answers to. But she keeps friending me back after i defriend her. finally, I messaged her and asked her to leave me alone and that it really wasn't working out ("what" exactly, I don't know, but I can't be friends with her) I really wasn't just after her for sex, but I can see where all the crazy comes in.I'm now getting people from Baptist, Jehovah's Witness, and Mormen Churches coming to my door all the time (I go to a different church). I get all these advertisements for gay porn and REALLY nasty stuff I'm not interested in that I don't even want to go into it's so nasty). I get these through my WORK e-mail and my regular mail as well.I found out whenI was trying to take my niece out to McDonalds that two of my credit cards were cancelled. Good thing I had money on me, I was planning on surprising her with a mini-shopping spree but thankfully I didn't tell her because she would have been disappointed. I also ahd three scary-looking guys come to my door insisting that I owed money for something I definitely haven't done at all. And I'm thinking this girl is behind all of this.What did I do wrong and how to I get her to stop if I can't prove anything?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2013): OPI talked to my pastor and I told him everything. He prayed over me and we agreed that it was because I got intimate with her soon upon meeting her. Had I not done that, had I not invited her to my place, this wouldn't have happened. But also, if I contacted her to make amends, she probably will not respond well and she is already causing problems for me. I can ask the churches who are contacting me to pray for me but to remove me from their list as I already have a church I am happy with. I take this as a sign to spend more time with God and less trying to chase women.We also decided that I was being punished for messing around with this woman - she felt used and insulted and is acting out and needs prayer more than punishment. All I had to do was get my credit cards turned back on and she hadn't spent a dime - they were simply shut off. I was able to take my niece out after all! I obviously have a lot more work to do on myself, but I wanted to update and wish you all a merry Christmas
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2013): I'm in agreement with everyone else about possible identity theft. and I'm sure you changed all your information and made it private so she couldn't contact you. But did you save anything that she had written or all the times she tried to contact you? I would definitely track as much of that information that you can and notify the police about it. I would avoid coming in to her first work place and I would do anything I could to block her from calling you. The only thing scary about that is that now you will have no warning when she is coming into your life again just to be crazy. I absolutely believe that she gave those churches and porno magazines your address as a form of "punishment" for whatever she thought you did to her, those things sound like they were meant to be more annoying than harmful but it IS causing harm at your workplace. What a mess! I hope she didn't use up your money or make it hard for you to get it back before you're done shopping (I think it's safe to assume you celebrate Christmas), and I hope you're able to clear this mess up right away.If she's in a shelter, the police probably know exactly which one that is so they should be able to find her pretty easily AND track down where she was when she got on the Internet and did those things. She could quite possibly get kicked out if she went on porno sites as there are probably children around and if she went to the library to use it, she could get banned from there. In the end, she really screwed HERSELF because everyone of those things was traceable.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (24 December 2013):
 Call the Police and ask what you need to do, De-friends her and BLOCK her on FB - change your number, check your credit report and see if there are any more odd charges, call your bank, you might have to have them change your bank account number.
Write EVERYTHING down - time date of these episodes.
If you have to change your phone number ( I honestly would)
Have your work change your e-mail address ( but print out any from her in case you need it.) Change your PRIVATE e-mail and last but not least CHANGE your key to your house.
YOU have no idea what she could have gotten into while staying with you.
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A
female
reader, ohbabycakesxx +, writes (24 December 2013):
You should go to the cops. Check you bank to see if anyone is making unverified purchases. Sounds like identity theft to me.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (24 December 2013): Repeort the three guys t o the police straight awawy. Message her saying to not contact you and not to send her friends over. Also do not text her, delete a text as soon as it comes up from her
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